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-   -   Found my daughter... now what? (https://www.classadrivers.com/forum/family-support-forum/42354-found-my-daughter-now-what.html)

Aja505 02-18-2013 07:08 AM

I can tell you from someone who found his father after 40 years of not knowing where or who he was. I tried finding my father for many years through different means ,writing letters to all kinds of agencies military and government from federal to local without any success and then one day I found a letter in my moms trunk with a name of a small town on it.. I proceeded to look in the phone book and call everyone in it with my last name until I finally found the right one. And I haven,t looked back since ,, my dad and I have a great relationship and I never regretted calling that number 20 years ago. So never assume that your daughter doesn't,t want to hear from you or talk to you. Let her know your out there and let her decide the next step you might be surprised.

dle 02-21-2013 02:22 PM

Wow, wow wow. It's been a while since I've checked this thread, but I'm glad (actually elated) that I did. I wonder how much of the information you have given her has matched with the mother's "explanation". Which also brings up an interesting question, what does her birth certificate say about her parents. Once again, Hobo, congratulations this certainty looks like its coming to a closure. I can't wait to hear about what happens at the reunion.

MoneyGreen 02-21-2013 03:57 PM

Wow, GolfHobo I don't even know you;but after reading your story it's heartwrenching to say the least!! I just joined the site, & I must say your story is very profound.I wish you the best of luck, & hope things work out for you!!!

golfhobo 02-22-2013 01:22 AM


Originally Posted by dle (Post 523925)
Wow, wow wow. It's been a while since I've checked this thread, but I'm glad (actually elated) that I did. I wonder how much of the information you have given her has matched with the mother's "explanation". Which also brings up an interesting question, what does her birth certificate say about her parents. Once again, Hobo, congratulations this certainty looks like its coming to a closure. I can't wait to hear about what happens at the reunion.

Thanks, DLE. Your first 3 words sum it all up! Her mother's version has differed a little but not too much. (She certainly didn't forget to tell her I hit her!) But she made it sound like that was why she left the last time and never came back. I have explained "logically" how that couldn't be possible for a couple of reasons. Basically, Denise has just accepted that we remember things differently, and she will never know the exact truth. We're moving forward.

Didn't ask her about the B/C but that is a good question. They CAN be altered, but if they had hers altered to add HIS name (to support the lie) I would think that would be illegal. More than likely, they just left it blank like it was before, and that supports the fact that they DID tell her she was born before they married. But, apparently, all these years, they've been putting too many candles on their anniversary cake! lol.

As for the reunion... I got another update of sorts coming.

golfhobo 02-22-2013 01:26 AM


Originally Posted by MoneyGreen (Post 523931)
Wow, GolfHobo I don't even know you;but after reading your story it's heartwrenching to say the least!! I just joined the site, & I must say your story is very profound.I wish you the best of luck, & hope things work out for you!!!

Thanks Money! Yes... my life has been hell. You go on with it... you live day by day. But, there is always a hole, and you never really feel joy about living.

Welcome to CAD. You won't find me around here as much from now on.... but, there are more capable truckers here to help you with any questions you might have.

golfhobo 02-22-2013 01:32 AM

Quick Update:
 
Just a quick update about our reunion - which hasn't even happened yet:

I remembered playing golf with my Dad and a buddy of his that used to be a V.P. or something at Wachovia HQ in in Charlotte. Of course, Wachovia was bought by Wells Fargo, and our friend has since retired from there. NOW... he runs (or works with) a company that audits banks... many banks.

He has agreed to (or suggested) a lunch with the 4 of us, followed by a one on one with Denise. IF they don't have an opening at HIS company, he said he will forward her resume (and hopefully a recommendation) to as many banks as he can.

I've seen her resume and it is quite impressive.

Wish us luck!

MoneyGreen 02-22-2013 04:05 AM

Great.Its always beautiful when things turn out for the better.Keep us posted on how things work out between the 2 of you.

GMAN 02-22-2013 09:35 AM

It is amazing what can happen in a few days. I am glad that things seem to be working out with your daughter. Do keep us posted.

4roses 02-23-2013 03:15 AM

hobo as for the B/C .... mom could of left it blank for who the father is, which You can always have your name added to it. But if she put the other man's name on it ... that very 'illegal' ... I made out B/C's while working in a Hospital for a while. .. That's a Big nono. But I guess the main thing is that You and Your Daughter are back together now. Enjoy, live life and be happy.

golfhobo 03-04-2013 07:39 AM

Another update:
 
Well, things really are happening fast! Only one week from today she'll be HERE! But... she couldn't wait that long I guess. Last week, I got a run through K.C. to Phoenix. took me right thru ABQ. Had to stall her on the way out cuz I needed to get there ASAP to get a good run back. But, I had some time to spare on the return trip, so I stopped in ABQ for about 3 hours... and had dinner with her! Good thing, too... cuz, my co-driver just quit and I probably won't be getting back out there again anytime soon. I'm probably going to shift to a SOLO run for a long while... maybe, permanent.

Anyway... it was the perfect "ice breaker." With her friend there, she felt more at ease... and we had a wonderful time. Now, she'll be less stressed over coming here to meet me and my family. Talked to my Dad the next day and he asked (jokingly,) "Well... now that she's met YOU, is she still coming to see US?" LOL!

I DID tell y'all that she is planning on moving here, right? So... now I see why I bought the boat! ;)

Things couldn't be better for me right now. I've wanted this ALL of HER life! Hate that it took so long, but... I still have a few good years left. Now, they won't be so lonely, and I won't be so depressed. I might even get to LIKE some of you! LOL!

I won't be wasting so much time arguing with idiots on the politics thread, but... I guess you've noticed that. But, I still want to be part of the board and will help new drivers if they are stupid enough to take my advice. ;)

I just want to thank ALL of you, once again, for your advice and support in this crucial matter in my life. I couldn't have asked for a better group of "friends" to lean on!

I will keep this thread going so I can give more updates. Many of you have almost as much invested in this as I have. I hope I'm not boring anyone.

If you want to see what "we" look like, or follow our friendship/relationship.... here is MY facebook page link: (I don't really wear those glasses. They are for reading.)

http://www.facebook.com/dennis.harris.9480

[Sorry I am so ugly. I know most of you thought I must be a GOD or something! lol! just friggin' KIDDING!]

Thanks again everyone! Be back soon.


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