I do not believe he was out to lunch for a friendly one on one conversation about work. They have been seen at the bar together to many times. I have found hotel reciepts crumbled up in his truck. I have kept track of our cell phone bill and have called up some of the unfamiliar numbers and one was for her home phone. I checked it against the white pages. I really could careless anymore what he does he will never change he will always lie. It is a shame but even the kids are starting to realize he lies. Can someone answer this "Why any person needs to get a cash advance of $150.00 to $300.00 a week?" This is what mine takes everyweek and is broke when he comes home. This is another reason I don't believe the so called "business lunches." While we sit here some weeks and struggle just to have food, he is out having great food.I make sure the bills get paid and I make very little at my job. Hopefully he'll grow up one day and find someone who wants to him. I know in my heart it is over and I will move on as soon as I get my finances in order( almost there). Thanks again for letting me vent
KEEP SAFE EVERYONE.
Otrwife

 

Those cash advances to the tune of one hundred fifty to three hundred dollars a week sounds steep if he's being provided funds to go on while he's out and about....if he's not leaving out with any funds in his pockets to eat on and purchase things he'll later be reimbursed for then he could very well be using that amount on the road. I know there were times when I was out and about that I contacted the boss through his home phone, after hours and such when I needed to reach him....some days I called him quite a few more times than other days to get information on what the next plans he had in place were or if there was an issue to let him know what was going on.

Wishing you all the best over there

 

The simple answer is bad cash management (budgeting).

The answer in your case is not going to be that simple.

 

My husband has always made sure he has money. He doesn't pay for anything to be reimbursed for. The cash advances are just for him to have money in his pocket. He eats at all the best restaurants (especailly when he is in Wisconsin and gets a ride) plus he spends money at the bars playing pool and drinking. One day he'll wake up without me and his kids and he can spend all he wants, I was stupid to stop my divorce 12 years ago I truly thought once we moved he would change. Oh well at least when I leave I know I did everything I was supposed to do. I stuck it out for the kids and to see if we could make it. I do not regret anything I just need to move on and find some happiness in my life.
STAY SAFE EVERYONE and GOD BLESS

OTRWIFE

 

Otrwive

Seems like you need to just get things off your chest. Go for it.

No advice, no comments, no useless opinions, Only listening. You did the right thing, you forgave and gave him a chance to change. He is just showing you he is not going to do that. Wish him well, No hard feelings, and let it go. Do yourself the biggest favor you could ever do, forgive him, pitty him and don't waste another precious moment dewelling on "what ifs".

Sorry I guess I gave advice after all. Feel free to disrgard, "who am I anyway"

God Bless,
TW
I'll drop a pm if you wish to talk any further in private.
Just let me know.

 

Forgiveness is a big thing, I am almost there. Unfortunately any love I have ever felt is turning to hate. He chose the open road over his secure loving family. I know I am not perfect, but I would never cheat, steal nor lie to make myself better. I made a commitment and I have children who need stability. Guess I should have opened my eyes wider. Thanks for listening and I do not mind advice. I believe it helps people look at things in different ways and makes us think more.
Again STAY SAFE EVERYONE AND GOD BLESS
otrwife

 

I know what it is like to be married to a man that lies like a rug. Mine is gone for 5 days and for the last month he has come home for home time and has gone and gotten a hotel room and then he comes home on the day he is to go back to work like it is ok.
The liar that he is went and stayed in a hotel about an hour from our home and tried to tell me he was at his job in upstate ny at a drivers meeting and I knew in my heart he was not there.
I did get my proof when I got an email from the hotel he stayed in on that day being as to how I booked at this chain in the past online and gave them my email address and to top it all off the woman that he fell in love with is from where he was staying so I put 2 and 2 together and realized he lied to me yet again.
And now he has her out on the road with him and is trying to make me believe he is alone but we have been gone since wednesday and all he has done was sent me a few texts and gave me a nasty call that night so i just told him to have fun with her because I know he is not alone.
I now realize I need to get over him and finalize the divorce and move on and let her have his lying butt until she wises up and see his true colors.
He will never change and I do know what it is like to be married to a liar.
It is hard but try to move on.

 

I have been extremely busy and have not had a chance to listen or vent. I still have the husband problem cheating, lieing, stealing and spending money. The best things that have happened lately, 2 of my daughters graduated from college, and 1 from high school, my son made the high school football team, and my youngest daughter made the cheerleading squad in middle school, and I have finally added another year to my teaching certificate. I just wanted to boast about something good in my life.

I guess going through all this with the cheating ............ has taught me a lot, I am closer to divorce than I have been in awhile. I refinanced my home and my vehicle, my schooling has upped my salary 3000 yr. I can finally make it with out him.

Most men, some women will never change it is all about them, like this week since we did refinance we had to come up with a large sum of money ( it was well worth it) so now I am broke and can't buy any food or pay any bills for a couple of weeks.I always figure something out, my kids come first. Unfortunately the first thing my husband did was grab a cash advance and tonight is in Wisconsin eating and drinking and playing pool. If anyone sees a man named Ron and he is playing pool at Tilly's Pub in Rothschild, Wisconsin tell him he is a loser. He has a beautiful family that has had enough with his lies. I can not tell you all how much this forum means to me I feel so good when I can vent and when I read about others I feel for them. The best thing I can tell everyone who is in this position, just pray and believe and the Lord will see you through. Hang in there and realize when a spouse cheats or lies, it is their problem they can't cope and then take the easy way out. God bless all of you out there, drive safe and have a great week.
THanks for all your help
otrwife