[Trukrswyfe]

Too lady,

Is there anyone else who you can talk to other then some strangers on the internet. No offense I just don't know your husband and would hate to give you bad advice for you. People say lawyer up like you have the dough or the resources to do that, not to mention your husbands temperment. Anyway, what you describe sound extremely painfull to be going through and I hope you have some support where you are. Woman and wife to another woman and wife I can only imagine what you are going through and am very sorry.

Trukrswyfe

[Truckfam]

Toolady,

It sounds like he asked for a divorce. This could either be he really wants to leave you, he only feels harassed by you, or he is having a major mid-life crisis.

You need to decide what you want to do, and what would be in the best interest for you and the kids.

Right now, I would suggest stop trying to contact him and track him down. Wait and see how long it takes for him to call home or come home to make sure everything and everyone is all right even if it takes six months or more. Use this time to think about everything.

If the kids are asking about him, have them call and leave a voice message.

As you are doing this, look at this as a separation. Remember you are still getting some money from him. If you do get a divorce, I seriously doubt you will see a penny from him.

Put your own finances in order. Make sure you are making enough to pay everything if he ever does divorce you. You may want to think about having a checking account in your own name where you deposit the money you make. This way he won't have access to it, and try to use it.

Be prepared to be able to move if necessary, especially if things get really ugly. You may want to start to try to take your name off joint accounts if possible, except the one where he deposits his checks into. If you don't have joint credit cards, then he will not be able to charge them up, and try to pin them on you later on in a divorce.

At the same time also be prepared for the best. God can work miracles, and he may snap out of a mid-life crisis if he is in one. If he is accusing you of things, give those things consideration. Are you actually doing what he is accusing you of? If so, you may want to try to stop doing those things. If not, then there is nothing you can do.

If you suspect he is cheating on you, and you decide to try to salvage this marriage, know he may never change no matter what you do. The best thing you can do for him is to pray for him. God can do the impossible.

No matter what you do decide to do, if he is cheating on you, he very well may have contracted some sort of STD. That is something you want to keep in the back of your mind if he ever wants to get back in your marriage bed.

Stay safe, pray for guidance, and do what would be best for you and the children. If you are a Christian, remember this. The Bible does allow for divorce if the one spouse cheats on the other. Be wise as a serpent, but gentle as a dove.

[toolady]

I appreciate what everyone has said. I do know what I have to do, but it is hard. I guess deep down I do love him, but we can't keep at each other like this. Being away from a family can't be easy on anyone. I just feel my husband enjoys the freedom. My son is going through so much turmoil right now. He is having a hard time coping and is getting in fights at school. We have been together for 18 years and I believe my husband enjoys the freedom of not having to deal with any family issues while at the same time having somewhere to call home.
The company he works for lies alot to their employees and spouses.He told me that. My son called dispatch last night to ask his dad to call him and we were told that he left an hour before and is headed to Fla. which meant he may have time to stop at home and see his son on his birthday( which is today). This morning my son talked to his dad and his dad is still in Wisconsin. Why would dispatch lie? This has killed my son. I really appreciate having a place to just vent and having nice people giving advice. My family doesn't like to hear about problems. I am alone to deal with alot. God bless all of you out there and please be careful on the road. P.S I know I am not perfect but I would never cheat nor lie to my husband it just isn't worth the Lord getting mad at me or my children.

[homealone3]

There are other sights that truckers wives can go and discuss and get support.

One that I know of is http://atruckerswife.com

Good luck.

[Slimland]

First off you need proof! Just because you think someone is givving you dirty looks, doesn't mean they actualy are.. For EX: I always look like I am mad, but I am not--it's my eyebrows and eye combination, just looks that way. As for acting like you don't exist, it is possible that she doesn't even think about it, what I mean is -- well lets look at it this way. If she and your husband is NOT having an affair my question is-- How is she supposed to act, is she supposed to give you attention?

How did he lie about talking to her for 6 months, isn't she a dispatcher? He probly didn't even think of telling you that he talked to her. Since it was probly work related. Thats not lying. Lying would be to talk to her, and think he has to cover it up, because he did something wrong.

If what I proposed is the issue, then you asking {what her problem is} is way out of hand, and your husbands response was justifyable--It is his job.

Now Roses has said to follow your gut-- I have to disagree with this.. I have been accused before and have never cheated.. Sometimes and I know I will get guff for this-- Women make something out of nothing, and read into things that arn't there. Like a football team getting into a huddle, and all the sudden she thinks there talking about her..

All I am saying is Get the FACTS and the Proof, before you make a mistake, that can ruin your marriage.

As for the rest, I don't know -- If he is not cheating, then are you nagging, putting him down or leaning into him? this can make a man stay away.

Or maybe he is cheating, just get the facts and proof.

Sincerely
Slimland

[toolady]

My husband came home this weekend and we chose to talk and try to see where our marriage was going. It was a pretty good we were almost there and then I found out he has another cell phone and tells me the company gave it to him in case of an emergency. How many companies give you a trac fone for your personal use? I tried to call it today and he changed the number. When I asked him he tells me he gave it back to the company and doesn't want it. Needless to say I don't know how much I am supposed to take. Anyway I'll just take my time and have some fun for awhile and then take care of myself and kids. Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays to each and everyone of you. To all you truckers please stay safe and warm and may God guide you along the way. STAY SAFE.
Thanks for listening.
Toolady

[Trukrswyfe]

TooLady,


Truly I am very sorry hear about this recent developement. I think you are on the right path to enjoy you holiday with your kids and deal with it later. God Bless and Merry Christmas.

One of many Truckerswives.

Trukrswyfe

[Useless]

I lost my girlfriend due to cheating. My wife found out about her.

Then, she found out about my wife.

Then, I found out that BOTH of those b*tches were CHEATING on ME!!!

WITH EACH OTHER!!!

OOOOOHHHHHHH, The pain!! :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry:

Somebody get me another beer!!!!
:cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry:

[Trukrswyfe]

Originally Posted by Useless

I lost my girlfriend due to cheating. My wife found out about her.

Then, she found out about my wife.

Then, I found out that BOTH of those b*tches were CHEATING on me!!!

WITH EACH OTHER!!!

OOOOOHHHHHHH, The pain!! :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry:

Somebody get me another beer!!!!
:cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry:

Girls will be girls It best you don't try and figure us out. You'll just get tired!