[Shaunna]

I am a 23 yr old female single mother with a son who is almost 2 yrs old. I have always wanted to be a truck driver because I LOVE DRIVING and they make good money without having to wear those fancy skirts everyday.
Right now, I am unemployed and seriously in debt. I am blessed to even still have my lights on...yeah it is that bad. But I have been faced with the opportunity of attending truck driving school in St. Louis with MTC. They say I will have a guaranteed job before I even go to training.
But of course any mother must have a solid plan. So here it goes...
Say that I ask my son's father to keep my son while I work to get us a better financial life. I attend that school and start working for the company they assign me to and I work for them for approx 3 years. That will give me the means to pay off my debt, especially since I won't need to rent a apartment or own a car and can save money to buy a house during that time. And then use my OTR experience to find a local driving job...just in time for my son to begin Kindergarten.

Am I thinking reality or fantasy....How would it really work?

Also, see my addition to this post explaining a little better my situation. :?

[ScubaDue]

The way you phrase it -- "my son's father" -- makes me think you are divorced/never married/not partnered with this person.

On a legal note, please be aware that if you hand over your son for three or four years ("in time for Kindergarten"), that your ex may have a priority claim on the child, and may win in a custody battle, if he won't return the child voluntarily. On the other hand, the life of an OTR driver is such that it might benefit the child greatly to be with his father, rather than his mother.

Also, please factor in child support in your calculations -- if he's keeping the child, legally you'd have to pay support -- of course, if your ex is so stupid that he doesn't think of getting the court to change the child support decree, that works in your favor!

I think your plan is great, and I think it's important for you to get a solid financial footing -- but please be aware that the cost may be one you are not willing to pay. I say this as a woman who -- if she had a child -- would probably HAPPILY leave it with the father and take off for the open road, as fast as she could! I realize that not all women are like me, however!

If you trust your ex to honor your agreement, I say go for it! Just realize that the law isn't going to be on your side, but on his,should he choose to change his mind.

[Doctor Who]

yeah it is that bad. But I have been faced with the opportunity of attending truck driving school in St. Louis with MTC. They say I will have a guaranteed job before I even go to training.

HMMM, If this school says you'll be guarenteed a job you may want to walk away... That is a mighty big claim and what would happen if you didn't get through the school... So much for the Fantasy!!!

Say that I ask my son's father to keep my son while I work to get us a better financial life. I attend that school and start working for the company they assign me to and I work for them for approx 3 years. That will give me the means to pay off my debt, especially since I won't need to rent a apartment or own a car and can save money to buy a house during that time. And then use my OTR experience to find a local driving job...just in time for my son to begin Kindergarten.

Am I thinking reality or fantasy....How would it really work?

I'm guessing you and the other party are seperated, leaving the kid with him may work but then again he could play the kid like a fiddle and don't think for one second a two year old won't remember, they will and all it would take is the father telling the kid on a daily basis that his mother abandoned him!!! The Hollywood scenario you're dreaming of very rarely works in real life (Sure would be great if it did!!).

Are you sure you can handle the OTR life style if you make it that far????
It's not easy to go from OTR to local.. It can be done however, as I've noticed in quite a few help wanted ads local companies have a problem hiring OTR drivers.. Can't explain why but it's looking like it is going to be a growing trend!!!

All I have is this to say. Get everything in wrighting. From the school and from your babys father. And notorized also Schools cannot guarentee you employment after you finish. And as to the kid part listen to everyone else. I have no expereince in that area.

[willyworm]

Shaunna,
first I will congratulate you on the simple fact that you want to pay your bills, and make a better life for your son and yourself.
To often in todays world, people are to damn lazy to work and pay their own way, and having a child is not a retirement plan, it's time to work.
So Congratulations on wanting to work!

Before you go into more debt, check with job and family services
You may qualify for some education money, that you don't have to pay back.

THERE IS NO GUARANTEED JOBS AFTER SCHOOL so don't fall for it.

Check with "Schneider National" they offer schooling and they pay you while you learn and pay for your Motel and meals until they start paying you. and they have one of the best safety training in the country.

Don't go into any more debt, that the thing you want to get out of...Right!

Trucking is not like a vacation, it's work, and you will have to become focused on your goal.
Leaving your son at home and get in that truck for days or weeks will be the hardest thing you ever do! .....It will hurt like hell! ....But I quess it should!

Now the important part:
1: Are you and your sons Father on real good standing and get along as far as your son goes? do you trust him.........totally.??
You can't be thinking about home and what's going on there. you have to stay focused on the job at hand .....or you won't make it.
It will drive you crazy.

2: if your not married and don't have a custody agreement, as to who has custody rights and all that legal stuff
You should contact an Attorney and have the necessary paper work drawed up for temporary custody for health care and so as to protect you custody rights later. ....just do it right .......it's worth it. because you don't want to be accused of abandonment of your son later......it happens.

Your own Attorney, or Legal Aid attorney, but YOUR'S ....not you and your boy friends.....Yours!!

Also have a will made, and set up a trust for your son if something would happen to you [God forebid] have your life Insurance place in the trust for your son..........Its one way of taking care of your son even if you can't.

I hope this helps you
GOOD LUCK

But be honest with yourself. ........do you really want it that bad???

[Sleeves]

I may be a bit different than some. I would say no dont do it. I have a son that is going through a divorce and wants to be a driver. I have tried to talk him out of it because of his 3 kids. Ages 6mos to 5yo. Children need their parents and a son that has lived with you all his life no matter how short that may have been need the parent even more so. Driving is very rough on families and can be very very rough on the kids.

While the school your thinking of attending may promise a job it might not happen. It will depend on your background and if you make it through schooling and OTR training. Another factor is the amount of money you will make your first year out. Schools and recruiters may tell you some nice high figures. That will not happen. School cost money so you won't make any. Most OTR training companies will not pay you much while training. Alot of what you do make willo be spent living on the road. Then your first few months will be spent trying to learn the job. Learning routes, directions and how to drive with a log book is going to slow you down. Not leaving out that most companies will not work a trainee or new solo driver as hard. Alot of trainees I have talked with average from $20-$25k their first year out. With the cost of living on the road that comes down to not much money to put away.

It will be your decision as far as your future career goes. Just remember that not only you but your family or child will also have to sacrifice alot. The emotional stress can be very rough. But, you have a plan. That is more than alot of newbies have. If you keep it real and your expectations are realistic it could work for you. Besides it doesn't take 3 years to be eligible for a local job. Local is something you might waht to check into now before the OTR job.

[Shaunna]

Thank you! I am getting some real sincere replies to my posts.
Since last night when I posted my situation, I have found a school that is alot cheaper and found out that my local unemployment office will pay for it if the funds are available. The school I talked to seems more realistic and it's right here in town.
As it goes for my son's father...we have been dating and taking care of our child together since we conceived. We do have seperate living quarters but we are both very much apart of our son's life. I will take the advice of securing my rights for custody through an attorney and will talk to a social worker about it too before I go on the road.
Also, good news...I may not have to spend long on the road if I don't want too. The guy at the school said you can very well come home and drive a dump truck or other small truck without experience if I have any regrets about leaving my son.

I am still open for more advice and reality.

[Simple Man]

Your young (23) and most companies won't hire people under 25 for insurance purposes. Remember large debt to you is chump change to others. Sign up for a local college, single mothers usually quailfy for pell grants to pay for it and then take out a stafford loan to pay off your debt. Find a college of your choice and talk to the financial advisor. Providing you have a HS diploma if not get your GED and then do it. Physical therapy is a easy degree to get for women and pays good. I would try to get into a registered nursing program after that. If your willing to go to school and learn, do something that will pay off in the end.
" set a goal, and you have become successful"