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Old 12-17-2006, 06:46 PM
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Default Advise for wannabes with young families

I'm fairly new to driving, 6 months, and am married and have 3 young children ages 18 mos - 9 yrs old and I just wanted to let anyone who was looking into driving otr that it isn't easy. My wife was behind me 100% when I started and went away to school, but it was more than she expected. You are not home for everything and miss out a whole lot. After driving for 2 mos., I was given the ultimatum "Come home or we won't be here." I didn't know what to do, but am glad I work for the company I do. PAM if anybody wondered. We have always been in debt and I couldn't see owing yet someone else $5,000. After my wife said that I called dispatch and explained everything to them. I told my wife I was on my way home and that I was working with the company to try and get home more. 3 days after speaking with PAM, they Qualcommed me and asked if I was interested in driving a dedicated route. I am now one of the very few drivers whose company worked around his family and kept him rolling. I am lucky and fortunate enough to have embarked on a new career where I am home every other day, every weekend, and every holiday. My marriage was saved while I still get to do what I enjoy. My story is a rarity and anyone with a new young family should look elsewhere for a career unless they are looking for an out already.
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Old 12-17-2006, 11:00 PM
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Default Re: Advise for wannabes with young families

Quote:
Originally Posted by dadx378
I'm fairly new to driving, 6 months, and am married and have 3 young children ages 18 mos - 9 yrs old and I just wanted to let anyone who was looking into driving otr that it isn't easy. My wife was behind me 100% when I started and went away to school, but it was more than she expected. You are not home for everything and miss out a whole lot. After driving for 2 mos., I was given the ultimatum "Come home or we won't be here." I didn't know what to do, but am glad I work for the company I do. PAM if anybody wondered. We have always been in debt and I couldn't see owing yet someone else $5,000. After my wife said that I called dispatch and explained everything to them. I told my wife I was on my way home and that I was working with the company to try and get home more. 3 days after speaking with PAM, they Qualcommed me and asked if I was interested in driving a dedicated route. I am now one of the very few drivers whose company worked around his family and kept him rolling. I am lucky and fortunate enough to have embarked on a new career where I am home every other day, every weekend, and every holiday. My marriage was saved while I still get to do what I enjoy. My story is a rarity and anyone with a new young family should look elsewhere for a career unless they are looking for an out already.
Good for you!

It sounds like you handled this situation like a man. You didn't abandon the truck and run home to momma. That is how quite a few people would have handled your type of situation. A little communication and common sense goes a long way out here.

And I have known a few drivers at PAM, that also had similar situations. PAM did a good job of working with those drivers too.

Good luck, and be careful out there! :wink:
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Old 12-18-2006, 06:52 PM
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Good post! More potential drivers should consider what you have written.
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Old 12-21-2006, 05:28 PM
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hehehehehehehehe hehehehehehehehehe hehehehehehehehehe, wow sorry just could not hold it in, to me it sounds like a young marriage, you were too young to get married I am affaid to say, but anyhow it sounds to me like the wiife was almost in charge of your destiny.... you did the right thing by talking with the company and working out what works best.. if you lost yer wife , well yer young just find another one...
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Old 12-21-2006, 06:25 PM
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Quote:
if you lost yer wife , well yer young just find another one...
With all due respect, I have to interject a thought. That kind of thinking is why the divorce rate is so high in America and why so many children end up the product of broken homes. Marriage vows should be top priority to a person and remember, this guy has 3 children, too.

As far as PAM working it out, I think that's great. But the sobering side of the coin is that dedicated runs don't last forever and if and when it goes away, he'll be back in the same boat. Hopefully, he'll be to a point where he has the experience to land something local back home.
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Old 12-21-2006, 06:30 PM
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uglymutt :roll:
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Old 12-21-2006, 06:52 PM
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ugly mutt are you married? how many times and how long? how old are ya? been driving long? got a family? i am lucky in a way. i am a widower with kids all growed up and on their own. otr is not for everyone. those with young families usually don't make it with either family or job or both. we both know the glory and adventure of otr trucking. being away from family 8-10 weeks at a time. the beautiful scent of diesel fumes mixed with urine, which is gotta be good for our health. shucks it has gotta be good because it is everywhere we are allowed to park at. the healthy food that is offered at every truck stop. the active lifestyle, the low prices we get on everything we need and buy at truck stops, right? local drivers are the next step for the freight we haul. shucks regional, dedicated, and local drivers have just as an important role in transport of freight goods as us otr drivers. we are all part of the industry. a local regional or dedicated job would make me quit this industry, and go back to bike building. thank gosh for otr. ps. merry xmas where ever you end up at.
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Old 12-21-2006, 07:11 PM
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well I was being serious and funny at the same time, yeah I have a wife and she does not like this otr crap at all..... I still maried because I talk to her and tell her its only for a short time, then I move up the ladder, this man is lucky to have gotten a dedicated job because most noobs just quit, I am not going to quit and my marriage is holding on, I got kids on the way so its not like I don,t understand this mans problems. but his advice only applies to people in his shoes, I am not in his shoes, my problems are not like his, there worse in my book, if my wife wanted too leave or gave me the choice to quit I would quit and go work at mcdonalds and get on welfare if thats what she wants, but my wife wants more , she is lookin at the future, why because we work our marriage together and communicate, she don't like me being gone all the time, I don't like being gone all the time, but in the end it will work out, it will just take some time is all and I still got some time left before i die, the money I make supports my family now and in time things will get better, its not time to go backwards and loose everything I worked hard for, my wife understands that part and I love her for holding on, I was born in 64 so I am not old but not young either, if I was single I would live in my truck, if I ws 23 years old I would be humping lizards like the world waas gonna end, I am married and believe I need too support my family the best I can and I am doing the best I can right now, no life is perfect and no family is perfect except for yours damn it....
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Old 12-21-2006, 07:36 PM
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That was a much better post than your last 1 mut. At least you pointed out the life and your experience that time.
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Old 12-21-2006, 07:49 PM
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:lol: gotta agree with glasman. you are one of the real guys doing otr to do the dues, you got my respect and so does your wife. it is hardest on them than us. i don't visit lizards. i grew up on the streets and they helped me get thru school, and i know there is no substitution for love. fortunattly i have someone who understands truckin being a trucker herself. as an older man, or just a man, i wait until we are together when i need or she needs . we have only been together since 1 month before i started truckin. hang in there. the job you want will happen in time and you will get to see kids in sports and scouts.
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