Dad is fading fast
#11
05-19-2007, 05:18 AM
Originally Posted by golfhobo
Midnight:
One evening I had the pleasure of passing by Lake Dardanelles at sunset. You know the time, when the light is just right on the lake giving it that shimmering blue appearance. And calm as glass. The hills in the background were silhoueted against the most magnificent red-clouded sky. There was a single small boat on the lake, in which sat a man and his son, fishing. And overhead soared a single bird on effortless wing. It was just Sooooo peaceful and beautiful that I had to stop and just take it all in for awhile. It had been a long day of hard driving, and I just needed the break. Some might feel "robbed" by a sunset, because it marks the end of their "useful" day, and forbears the dark of night. To me, it is the icing on the cake.... a "reward" for having survived whatever that day threw at me. Your dad has had a long, hard life. Now comes his peaceful reward. I pray that somehow, you learn not to think of these last days as painful and unfair, but rather as the quiet, peaceful and beautiful passing from the toils of day into the cool, still rest of night. May God grant you the peace of understanding, as the angels take your father home to his glorious reward for a job well done. Hobo You never cease to amaze me Hobo, what a beautiful post! You definitely have a way with words!!!! 
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#12
05-19-2007, 07:16 AM
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Livin' large in the Ozark mountains of western Arkansas
Posts: 1,360
Originally Posted by golfhobo
Midnight:
One evening I had the pleasure of passing by Lake Dardanelles at sunset. You know the time, when the light is just right on the lake giving it that shimmering blue appearance. And calm as glass. The hills in the background were silhoueted against the most magnificent red-clouded sky. There was a single small boat on the lake, in which sat a man and his son, fishing. And overhead soared a single bird on effortless wing. It was just Sooooo peaceful and beautiful that I had to stop and just take it all in for awhile. It had been a long day of hard driving, and I just needed the break. Some might feel "robbed" by a sunset, because it marks the end of their "useful" day, and forbears the dark of night. To me, it is the icing on the cake.... a "reward" for having survived whatever that day threw at me. Your dad has had a long, hard life. Now comes his peaceful reward. I pray that somehow, you learn not to think of these last days as painful and unfair, but rather as the quiet, peaceful and beautiful passing from the toils of day into the cool, still rest of night. May God grant you the peace of understanding, as the angels take your father home to his glorious reward for a job well done. Hobo Thank you for the beautiful post, Hobo. This is appreciated very much. It's kind words of wisdom and comfort like these that help keep my family and I going through this difficult time.
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"Looks like a legend and an outta work bum look a lotta like Daddy," Little Enos Burdette. Hook 'em Horns!! "Life is hard. It's harder if you're stupid." John Wayne "Talk to me Goose". "What we're dealin' with here, is a complete lack of respect for the law," Sheriff Buford T. Justice. Friends don't let friends drive for C.R. England!
#13
05-19-2007, 08:22 AM
Midnight Flyer, I am sorry to hear this. Please know, that you are in my thoughts, and prayers.
#14
05-19-2007, 08:26 AM
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Posts: n/a
Re: Dad is fading fast
Originally Posted by Midnight Flyer
Well my dad, who was diagnosed with terminal lung cancer last December, is fading fast in the nursing home. His breathing is very shallow and labored and he no longer recognizes anyone. Because he couldn't tolerate any nourishment, the feeding tube into his stomach was removed the other day and he is just being kept comfortable. Today the hospice nurse said he could very well pass away this weekend. At least he won't be suffering any more. It sure hurts to see your hero and best friend lying there dying and in so much pain. Be sure and hug your dad tonight or tomorrow and tell him you love him. Real men aren't afraid to hug their dad and tell him you love him. :cry:You brought tears to my eyes. Its was only a few short weeks ago (April 20) that my dad died, he was 49 and a driver for almost 30 years. He had Mutliple Myleoma, a form of cancer. It was hell...just as you are doing right now, i spent 6 weeks beside my dad. He had Good Sam Hospice, they provided him/us with everything: hospital bed, O2, bed pan etc... When the doctors sent my dad home (he didnt' want chemo, as he was in the later stages of cancer, and chemo wouldn't have helped) they said he would have a year or so, less than 2 months later he's gone. His hospice nurse came out on Monday, he was fine; good vitals etc.. Tuesday he had a little cough, we thought it was the start of a cold. By Wednesday he was in unbareable pain. He was bent over in a fetal position from the pain. We put a 911 page out to the Hospice RN, and she was there in less than an hour. She said "this is part of the process, he probably has 2 - 3 days left" They upped his morphine and left. Then we waited. Day and night me my mom and sister were beside him. He was unresponsive. He would make noises and was talking to God and his father (who died in 2001) but other than that nothing. Friday afternoon the Hospice RN and CNA came out for their regular visit. They were shaving him, giving him bath and washing his hair when my sister said "is he breathing?". The RN said "well he has stopped" !!!!!! (I was in a state of shock and disbelief because he didnt make a peep.) About 30 seconds later he took 3 more breaths, then he stopped the last time. And that was it, he was gone. I go to his grave at least once a week. I went Thursday, sat down and had a smoke with him :-) Nothing can prepare you for what is about to happen. To matter how ready you think you are, you're not. My dad will be dead a month tomorrow, and it hurts just as much now as it did then. If it weren't for my family and a few really good friends, there is no way I could have gotten through the past 3/4 weeks. Find yourself a couple people to lean on. You are going to need comfort and support from the ones that are closest to you. And when your father does go, you're going to have more fried chicken than you ever thought possible! lol
#15
05-19-2007, 09:03 AM
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Livin' large in the Ozark mountains of western Arkansas
Posts: 1,360
Re: Dad is fading fast
Originally Posted by AlexJ81
Originally Posted by Midnight Flyer
Well my dad, who was diagnosed with terminal lung cancer last December, is fading fast in the nursing home. His breathing is very shallow and labored and he no longer recognizes anyone. Because he couldn't tolerate any nourishment, the feeding tube into his stomach was removed the other day and he is just being kept comfortable. Today the hospice nurse said he could very well pass away this weekend. At least he won't be suffering any more. It sure hurts to see your hero and best friend lying there dying and in so much pain. Be sure and hug your dad tonight or tomorrow and tell him you love him. Real men aren't afraid to hug their dad and tell him you love him. :cry:You brought tears to my eyes. Its was only a few short weeks ago (April 20) that my dad died, he was 49 and a driver for almost 30 years. He had Multiple Myeloma, a form of cancer. It was hell...just as you are doing right now, i spent 6 weeks beside my dad. He had Good Sam Hospice, they provided him/us with everything: hospital bed, O2, bed pan etc... When the doctors sent my dad home (he didnt' want chemo, as he was in the later stages of cancer, and chemo wouldn't have helped) they said he would have a year or so, less than 2 months later he's gone. His hospice nurse came out on Monday, he was fine; good vitals etc.. Tuesday he had a little cough, we thought it was the start of a cold. By Wednesday he was in unbearable pain. He was bent over in a fetal position from the pain. We put a 911 page out to the Hospice RN, and she was there in less than an hour. She said "this is part of the process, he probably has 2 - 3 days left" They upped his morphine and left. Then we waited. Day and night me my mom and sister were beside him. He was unresponsive. He would make noises and was talking to God and his father (who died in 2001) but other than that nothing. Friday afternoon the Hospice RN and CNA came out for their regular visit. They were shaving him, giving him bath and washing his hair when my sister said "is he breathing?". The RN said "well he has stopped" !!!!!! (I was in a state of shock and disbelief because he didnt make a peep.) About 30 seconds later he took 3 more breaths, then he stopped the last time. And that was it, he was gone. I go to his grave at least once a week. I went Thursday, sat down and had a smoke with him :-) Nothing can prepare you for what is about to happen. To matter how ready you think you are, you're not. My dad will be dead a month tomorrow, and it hurts just as much now as it did then. If it weren't for my family and a few really good friends, there is no way I could have gotten through the past 3/4 weeks. Find yourself a couple people to lean on. You are going to need comfort and support from the ones that are closest to you. And when your father does go, you're going to have more fried chicken than you ever thought possible! lol Alex:My thoughts and prayers go out to you on the death of your father and you and your family have my heartfelt sympathy. Mom and I are already trying to ready ourselves for the inevitable but, as you said, nothing will prepare us for his death. Mom talked to the people at one of our local funeral homes this afternoon. Thankfully we have our close friends and church family and I also have all the good folks here at CAD. With God's help and grace we'll see ourselves through this. I'll just be glad that he won't be suffering anymore.
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"Looks like a legend and an outta work bum look a lotta like Daddy," Little Enos Burdette. Hook 'em Horns!! "Life is hard. It's harder if you're stupid." John Wayne "Talk to me Goose". "What we're dealin' with here, is a complete lack of respect for the law," Sheriff Buford T. Justice. Friends don't let friends drive for C.R. England!
#16
05-19-2007, 09:06 AM
Guest
Posts: n/a
Yes sir, no more pain! It just rips me apart to think of someone else having to go through the loosing their father because of some f**** up disease like cancer.
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#17
05-19-2007, 11:13 AM
Midnight- my prayers to you and your family. When I crossed this bridge several years ago I focused on all the positives that happened between us. My father died of a heart attack, but my mother passed in much the same way as your father is. At times like this we all have to have faith that The Lord will welcome him home with open arms and make a special place in heaven. Best of thoughts to your Mom and Family. God Bless, Bill
#18
05-19-2007, 12:39 PM
oh {{{{{mignight}}}}}
you and your whole family has had my thoughts and prayers these last months. give him a kiss on the forehead from me, rub his hand, touch him as much as you can and talk to him.....tell him anything and everything that comes to your mind, even if it's a simple "i love you dad". Di
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#20
05-19-2007, 02:46 PM
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Livin' large in the Ozark mountains of western Arkansas
Posts: 1,360
I can't believe how many people here on CAD have been affected by this horrible disease called cancer. Everyone has a father, mother, brother, sister, family member or friend that has been stricken by some form of cancer. I may get in trouble with the moderators here with this suggestion but here goes: Go to The American Cancer Society's website (I think it's www.cancer.org) and make a donation in the memory of your loved one or friend. Every dollar, no matter how small, donated will make a big difference in the fight against this horrendous disease. Maybe we or our kids or grandkids will live to see the day when cancer is just a painful memory. :cry:
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"Looks like a legend and an outta work bum look a lotta like Daddy," Little Enos Burdette. Hook 'em Horns!! "Life is hard. It's harder if you're stupid." John Wayne "Talk to me Goose". "What we're dealin' with here, is a complete lack of respect for the law," Sheriff Buford T. Justice. Friends don't let friends drive for C.R. England! |
