[silvan]

Wisdom says it's almost always better just to suck it up and stay on the big road when there's a big accident ahead. You get off to go around, get into a big tangle with 3,000 other trucks that have no idea how to drive on skinny roads (I do, but a lot of these hands don't), get lost in the woods, hit a light bridge or a low underpass, etc. It's a good rule of thumb just to suck it up, throw on the four-ways, stay in whatever lane you're in, and be patient.

However, the last time I employed this strategy, I got stuck in a backup for over four hours, crawling at a steady 1.x mph. It was insane. Normally you creep up a couple of times, pop the brakes, and then prop your feet up on the dash for an hour or two, before it all breaks loose, but not this time. Not at all. Other dedicated drivers in other time slots were able to go around the mess, swap trailers, and get most of the way back to the other end of the loop before I even got free of this mess, let alone made my delivery an unprecedented five hours late.

It was with that memory fresh in my mind that I decided to go around an accident today. I had been hearing about the accident for some time, and it sounded like it wouldn't be too bad. As I got closer, I heard somebody say "Damn, I wish I had gotten off at exit 39." Lookie there, self, I say, there's the coveted exit 39 right before you, and it's just a blink blink away.. So I blink blinked in that paltry few seconds I had to make a choice. Got off no problem, got on US 11 no problem (I was on I-81), zooming up the little country road pretty well, and then everyone stopped.

There's bridge construction on US 11. This construction filters down below it to I-81 too, and that's why there's frequently a construction backup through there. Everybody says not to go around that construction backup, because there's construction on the bridge. Oh yeah. Dumbass. I forgot about that when I blink blinked. I guess something in my mind short-circuited, because I was thinking accident, not construction. Plus some other guy on the radio was yelling "Oh man, it's bad, I'd go around that, definitely. Get off on route 11." They were pulling a big truck out of the median, who I imagine wiped out due to some mixture of torrential rain and stupid fourwheelers.

I sat in the backup on the little road for a long time, watching the big road crawl pretty well, and then really well. There was a one lane bridge serving two different routes with an unusually high amount of traffic. Access was controlled by a stop light that allowed about three vehicles to come out from our direction, and then we got to sit there for ten minutes or something.

When my turn finally came, there were three fourwheelers ahead of me. One gone, two gone, three gone, light is still green, I've been sitting here for half an hour at least, and traffic on the big road has been mocking my stupidity for the last 20 minutes, I'M GOING FOR IT. There was a state trooper sitting there near the light, but I figured a green light is a green light, and if I didn't get all the way clear before it turned red, so what.

I turned too fast, didn't look at what I was getting into, and I completely f****d up the setup for the turn, which was MUCH tighter than I realized, just barely enough room to negotiate a perfectly planned turn. I would have seen this if I had caught a red light, and had to sit there for 10 minutes, but I was trying to get on through and go home already.

So I was all the way up against the wall on the right, with my brand new steer tire grazing the concrete, and I was still going to miss clearing the turn by a good foot or two. No way I could carry that turn through without scraping the shit out of both outside tires on that side of the trailer, maybe even ripping the tires off and ruining the rims, and possibly tearing the guard rail down in the bargain too.

Shit.

I looked in my mirrors, and saw a pickup right on my ass, wondering WTF I stopped for. So I popped the brakes, walked back and told the guy he was going to have to figure out somewhere else to be, because I had to back up. I climbed back up in the cab, and started to back up when I heard "DO NOT BACK UP! GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !! YOU CAN MAKE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GO NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" from my friendly neighborhood state trooper.

He was fit to be tied. I think he really wanted me to just rip the ever-loving shit out of the trailer and get out of everybody's way. He seemed to be just barely in control of his urge to get out his gun and shoot me on the spot.

Well, f**k the state trooper. I'm not going to tear up my boss's truck, and I'm not going to tear up the company's trailer. Not while I can help it I'm not, dammit.

So I put it in reverse again, to the trooper's obvious fury, and proceded to wiggle through about five iterations of nudging my trailer little by little. There was no room for a good swing, so this was incredibly tedious. I had forgotten the first rule of being a 10-year rookie, and left the radio on. I got to enjoy choruses of "Look at that idiot in the white Kenworth. He got stuck on the bridge! That idiot can't drive!" coming from the now completely clear Interstate below. Oh well, f**k them too, as I finally had the sense to turn off my damn radio.

I finally wiggled it enough to clear the guard rail, and I didn't tear anything up. Just one white mark on the steer tire, but no scratches. Because even though I clearly f****d up this turn, I CAN drive. An idiot would have ripped something up.

It was an adventuresome day. Then I missed the turn for I-81, and wound up going all the way through the middle of downtown Marion, which looked like it probably wasn't advised, or maybe not even legal.

Urf. I haven't been in a bind like this in many years, and I don't think I've ever been in one where I had to piss off quite this many people simultaneously; and definitely never a well-tempered and friendly state trooper.

Hallelujah, holy shit, where's the Tylenol?

[Hat Rak]

There was one time I decided to go around an accident and it saved me from losing hours on my day. It was down on I-20 between the AL and GA border, and I heard the warning well enough ahead where I was able to look at the map and figure out that the detour was a decent truck route, US 78. No other trucks were on the road with me and I could hear all the bickering and moaning from the main thoroughfare.

There was another time I decided to go around an accident, also on I-81 just south of Harrisburg, where I jumped off on 34 and took 641 east to 581. I realized as I got to the stop light to take the right on 641 that I'd have to nose my tractor to the other side of the 4 lane highway, because there was a street lamp right at the apex of the corner. So I make a baker's dozen 4-wheelers backup to let me clear the way, and a trucker behind me told me I was clear of the light and good to go.

The roads through Mechanicsburg and Shiremanstown grew narrower and I realized there was no turning around if things got hairy.

Things did. A 13'6" bridge up ahead. The rookie in me said "oh this is gonna be a close one!"

I approached the bridge, put on my 4-ways, crossed the yellow line to get into the center of the bridge underpass, and crawled at a couple mph, staring up my mirror just waiting for the big bad crunch sound.

No contact, off I went and delivered my load in Maine the next day.

[silvan]

Originally Posted by Hat Rak

The roads through Mechanicsburg and Shiremanstown grew narrower and I realized there was no turning around if things got hairy.

Reminds of a time I was following some route through West Chester, PA. I didn't know there was a truck bypass, and I was moving too fast and set up all wrong to take it when I saw it. So I had to just keep going through town, past big NO TRUCKS signs every 10'. I left a green sea of trimmed branches in my wake, and the pedestrians were not amused with me for driving down the middle of their little brick walkway thing, but I came out on the other side where the bypass connected back with the road I was on, and lived happily ever after.

Until today, that is. Note to self: DO NOT EVER GET OFF AT EXIT 39 YOU STUPID MORON.