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starkittyusa · Joined: 01 Jul 2005 Posts: 9 Location: Alabama

i agree with sunshine Mack...take his butt out on the road for the summer...let him do ALL the work. fueling. lumping (which u keep money to repay u for repairs to ur truck and friends car) no sleep unless u sleep, no video games. Tough Love is the best way to teach him responsibilities. As a mom of 3 now grown boys... they all are fine gentlemen. i am not a child abuser by no means...but a tuff situation like he has put u in would not get any sympathy from me. be as tuff on him as he has been on u. he will respect u for it later. if u let him slide even the slightest on this issue...it will only get worse. good luck...been there, done that.

JD45 · Joined: 04 Jun 2005 Posts: 65 Location: Midwest

I imagine that the justice system would teach him a lesson. Do the police know about the accident? These are some pretty serious charges. Grand theft auto, driving under the influence, and leaving the scene of an accident.

dle · Joined: 03 Jan 2005 Posts: 734 Location: Texas

Why are YOU looking for a job for him?

Have him get his happy little _ _ _ off the couch and start looking, and give him a short time period to find something. If after that time or he doesn't get off his little _ _ _ tell him that he will start working every spare minute cleaning. During that time make the payback small - $.50 a day.

My experience with law enforcement when it comes to juvenile problems is 100% depressing dissappointment.

The other side of this coin is that he may be calling out to you wanting something from you.

cdreid · Joined: 21 Jul 2005 Posts: 227

You pathetic *** would report your kid to the cops, get them to throw him in jail and not pay his bail? Talk about poor excuses for human beings. Military school? Mental masterbation is fun isnt it? Thinking about your son getting screamed at , hazed et al for the next year or two? Why the ungreatful little brat! After i spent a good ten seconds making him! You're going to take him away from all his friends. His life. His future. Inflict idiotic rambo wannabe drill sargeants on him as a teen.. because he made a mistake. You havent made any have ya? Specially when you were a teenager..

Go ahead. Listen to a group of sad old lonely hateful men tell you how to raise your kid. Send him to military school. He's not the one who's gonna pay. YOU are. Because he's going to remember what you do now for the rest of his life. Dont matter you think? "Hey ill always be his dad"? Well when you're 70 sitting in a truck somewhere alone wishing someone would call or ask you to visit. When your in an old folks home wondering why you never see your kid, etc etc etc you just remember the "wisdom" these jackasses taught you.

You will only EVER do one thing in your life thats important. Noone will remember the miles you ran. Noone will ever knwo the house you built was there. Your "career" will disappear into the ether the day you die. Your children are the ONLY thing you will EVER do that mean anything. The rest is just getting yourself "stuff".

Try putting him on the truck with you for six months. You'll get closer. He'll learn truck driving AND way more than pay you back in labor. And you both might learn something. That you'd even consider sending him to military school to "get him outa your hair" says a lot about your relationship already.

Twilight Flyer · Joined: 13 Nov 2002 Posts: 5793

Um, you might want to reread what the initial poster said. His kid didn't just screw up. His kid committed serious crimes, if you want to get down to the brass tacks of it all, and he was darn well lucky he didn't kill someone.

I make mistakes as an adult and made plenty as a teenager. All of us do and did. But few of us can claim credit for jacking a 19K pound rig and taking it to a drinking party, only to wreck it later on in an accident with another vehicle. Those of us that have screwed up to that level as a teenager, usually end up in juvi hall or worse.

In this kids case, if the punishment doesn't fit the crime (which was pretty darn serious and warrants some pretty serious action), he's the one you will read about in a few years that jacks a few cars and kills a few people on a merry crime spree across the country with one of his equally retarded friends. :roll:

Parents have a responsibility to love and teach their children and sometimes those lessons need to be harsh. Letting the kid off with a pat on the top of the head and an 'oh, it'll be all right, so let's go fishing' is little more than neglect. Children need to know there are consequences to every action, both good and bad. Those consequences should match the screw-up and if that means correcting serious disciplinary problems in a military setting, then so be it. While I agree that military school should only be a final solution if other serious consequences do not have the desired behavior-changing effect, military school is still a far better option than juvi hall or prison, which is exactly what's in this kid's future if he doesn't get straightened out. Ask yourself this: which would you prefer if it was your child?

yoopr · Joined: 01 Dec 2004 Posts: 12865

You're right Batman-Like in the news yesterday about the woman who wanted to be a "Friend" to her Kid-Had sex parties and furnished Drugs to them.

Just love hearing from these Anti-War -Anti-Military Whacko's :roll:

cdreid · Joined: 21 Jul 2005 Posts: 227

Im a vet. From your posts id bet you're just another chickenhawk freeper.

Twilight- What you said is true. He made a serious mistake. But he's a teenager. A kid. Remembr what its like to be a teenager? When i was one my brother "stole" the family car and left it in a ditch. Parents didnt put him in prison for it. If we'd had a 19kpound rig you can get thats what he would have done. When i was a teen I made mistakes. When you were so did you. It is part of growing up. The idea is to teach your children not to make mistakes like that. Not to compound it. Some of the posts in this thread were constructive. Like the driving suggestion. The make him work it off suggestions. Some of the others, like the aforementioned freeper dweeb, are just made by sad little men who want to see others in pain. Preferably others who cant fight back. If i gave you the impression i thought the kid shouldnt be taught a lesson its because my mouth doesnt always communicate.

yoopr · Joined: 01 Dec 2004 Posts: 12865

cdreid wrote: Im a vet. From your posts id bet you're just another chickenhawk freeper.

Twilight- What you said is true. He made a serious mistake. But he's a teenager. A kid. Remembr what its like to be a teenager? When i was one my brother "stole" the family car and left it in a ditch. Parents didnt put him in prison for it. If we'd had a 19kpound rig you can get thats what he would have done. When i was a teen I made mistakes. When you were so did you. It is part of growing up. The idea is to teach your children not to make mistakes like that. Not to compound it. Some of the posts in this thread were constructive. Like the driving suggestion. The make him work it off suggestions. Some of the others, like the aforementioned freeper dweeb, are just made by sad little men who want to see others in pain. Preferably others who cant fight back. If i gave you the impression i thought the kid shouldnt be taught a lesson its because my mouth doesnt always communicate.

I'll put my 214 against yours any day of the week you little twirp.
Been and saw more combat in 14 months than you've probably ever seen. You probably have seen NONE
I'm HARDLY a little man-door is WIDE open little boy

Twilight Flyer · Joined: 13 Nov 2002 Posts: 5793

First of all, enough with the posturing please on both sides. Tossing insults and threats over the internet is going to accomplish nothing but muddy up the thread. I got sick and tired of deleting pointless insult posts from a couple of posters earlier this week and do not wish to have to do it again.

Now, back to the topic.

Quote: When i was one my brother "stole" the family car and left it in a ditch

With all due respect, taking the family car and putting it in the ditch isn't even in the same ballpark as jacking Dad's truck and livlihood and hitting another car with someone in it. As I said, this kid was lucky he didn't kill someone or he'd be sitting in jail up on manslaughter charges.

Anyway, I don't disagree that there are preferrable methods to dealing with his problems than sending him off to boot camp right away. But as I said, I would much rather send my kid to military school than to juvi hall or prison, any day of the week. Maybe the kid will learn a lesson and straighten out before drastic measures need to be taken. Then again, maybe having a sergeant screaming in his face will be the only way. Better that than having a warden do it, with fifty other punk kids waiting outside the door to lead him down any number of dead-end paths.

cdreid · Joined: 21 Jul 2005 Posts: 227

But i get really sick of these chickenhawk freepers cowards tossing insults. Being told you and your friends who served are traitors by people who couldnt be bothered gets a little annoying.

Of course theres a difference in damage. Theres a difference in the scale of what he did. But the intent was the same. He just had a bigger opportunity to make worse mistakes. And frankly i thought the suggestion that he be put on the truck and be forced to work the money off over the next few months loading and unloading was brilliant.

Twilight Flyer · Joined: 13 Nov 2002 Posts: 5793

Quote: But i get really sick of these chickenhawk freepers cowards tossing insults. Being told you and your friends who served are traitors by people who couldnt be bothered gets a little annoying.

That's why I said both sides need to reign it in. There has been enough mud-slinging from both sides over the past week or two to cover everybody with crap about 6 inches deep. I'd like to see everyone, regardless of differences of opinion, just try and get along a bit better.

As to the suggestion of putting the kid on the truck, I though that was a good idea, too.

Random · Joined: 07 May 2005 Posts: 87

JD45 wrote: I imagine that the justice system would teach him a lesson. Do the police know about the accident? These are some pretty serious charges. Grand theft auto, driving under the influence, and leaving the scene of an accident.
I think he does need to be taught a lesson by the justice system......

MACK · Joined: 22 Apr 2005 Posts: 574

I have tried the truck idea before when he has got in trouble for drinking and other stuff and now I don't know what to do and I agree with Bat Boy Military school should be a last resort but it's the only thing left and I don't want him to end up in prison and he is now working his a** off doing anything and everything around hear and at the yard were the trucks park.

Aligator · Joined: 06 Sep 2004 Posts: 880

I'm an ex Juvenile delinquent and car thief. It all happened before I was 16, so it doesn't show anywhere. I even got a Top Secret clearance in the navy.

I'd have to know more about the kid. I'd grade him on appearance, quality of friends, work habits, degree of remorse for the act, attitude toward law enforcement, and maybe some other things.

I'm not too much in favor of beating him to death over it, but not too much in favor of coddling him, either. Number one; make sure he gets through high school. Then, maybe the service will appeal to him. If not, then a trade school of one sort or another....

If the kid is NOT going to finish high school, has friends that look like dirt bags, looks like a dirt bag himself, then I would take drastic action. But my experience is, you do the best you can to love the kid anyway.

My father and I didn't survive my adolesence. He forced me off into the navy, refused to allow me to come home after Boot Camp, refused to allow me to come home for Christmas, and I never forgave him. Not going to, either. Jerks have kids, too.

So you'll have lots of chances to blow it, lots of chances to make up.....best of luck with all of 'em. :)

MACK · Joined: 22 Apr 2005 Posts: 574

Just a update I sent him to military school and when he came back he was totally different much easier to get along with and doesn't sit there and whine when I tell him to do something and this summer me and him are going to go otr he will help me trying to repay his debt.

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