HELP!!! WIFE'S FEELINGS ARE HURT (POST NUPTIAL AGREEMENT)

[pigrider]

First of all I am a happily married man of 15 years! But I am on the mentality that life can throw you a curve ball. Just because we are happy now does not mean that 10 years down the road something can not and will not change.

As some might already know, in January of 2008 I plan to retire from my current job and return to trucking.

I explained to my wife that I wanted a post-nuptial to protect one (1) truck and one (1) trailer in the event that something might happen to our relationship over time!

I explained to her that the post-nuptial will only protect the one truck & trailer NOT any other assets that we may obtain over time to include: any monetary assets, additional units, land, buildings or etcs. Just one truck & trailer of my choice!

She has her masters degree in reading and is currently a literacy coach
for the local school district. She is also in the process of getting her principal degree! She has been in the education field for the past 15 years and is very passionate about her career!

In other words she has a career to fall back on!!! And I am just trying to protect my livelihood!!

Am I wrong! Am I being insensitive! She feels that marriages shouldn't have those types of agreements between!

Keep in mind I do love my wife very very much and I plan to grow old with her, but business is business!!

Honest opinions are very welcome and may I please here from some women, because I know men and women think different!!

Thanks in advance!!!

[Fredog]

First of all I am a happily married man of 15 years! But I am on the mentality that life can throw you a curve ball. Just because we are happy now does not mean that 10 years down the road something can not and will not change.

As some might already know, in January of 2008 I plan to retire from my current job and return to trucking.

I explained to my wife that I wanted a post-nuptial to protect one (1) truck and one (1) trailer in the event that something might happen to our relationship over time!

I explained to her that the post-nuptial will only protect the one truck & trailer NOT any other assets that we may obtain over time to include: any monetary assets, additional units, land, buildings or etcs. Just one truck & trailer of my choice!

She has her masters degree in reading and is currently a literacy coach
for the local school district. She is also in the process of getting her principal degree! She has been in the education field for the past 15 years and is very passionate about her career!

In other words she has a career to fall back on!!! And I am just trying to protect my livelihood!!

Am I wrong! Am I being insensitive! She feels that marriages shouldn't have those types of agreements between!

Keep in mind I do love my wife very very much and I plan to grow old with her, but business is business!!

Honest opinions are very welcome and may I please here from some women, because I know men and women think different!!

Thanks in advance!!!

my opinion, if she didnt care about taking the truck if things dont work out, then she would sign it. I think she wants to keep her options open in case you do her wrong

[pigrider]

No, she said that she will sign it, but she says that she does not want to have anything to do with it! It started out as our adventure! And that it makes her feel that she is not a part!

And my thing is I just want to protect one truck and trailer!

My things is am I wrong! I am man enough to make a U turn when I am wrong!!

[Fredog]

No, she said that she will sign it, but she says that she does not want to have anything to do with it! It started out as our adventure! And that it makes her feel that she is not a part!

And my thing is I just want to protect one truck and trailer!

My things is am I wrong! I am man enough to make a U turn when I am wrong!!

if she has a part in helping you get the truck and helping you make a success of it, then she deserves part of it if you split. HOWEVER, if you aready
have it and are successful before marrying her, then it's yours alone
Paul McCartney once said to Howard Stern.. "I dont need a pre-nup, I believe in love"

[pigrider]

No, she said that she will sign it, but she says that she does not want to have anything to do with it! It started out as our adventure! And that it makes her feel that she is not a part!

And my thing is I just want to protect one truck and trailer!

My things is am I wrong! I am man enough to make a U turn when I am wrong!!

if she has a part in helping you get the truck and helping you make a success of it, then she deserves part of it if you split. HOWEVER, if you aready
have it and are successful before marrying her, then it's yours alone
Paul McCartney once said to Howard Stern.. "I dont need a pre-nup, I believe in love"

Yeah and look at what happened to Paul McCartney! If Paul was to re-marry now he wouldn't say that! And in most divorces, there was LOVE somewhere before it got to that point!

I do not care about her having half if something happens I am just trying to protect 1 truck & trailer that's all!! Nothing more and nothing less!

[Larry Heyns]

Without a post-nuptial, a judge will side with you anyway. You give the ex the house, savings, better car; and agree to pay child support and alimony. The judge allows you to keep the truck and trailer payments. Been there, done that.

[century451]

Everything you aquire as a married couple should be split in a divorce....yes you are being insensitive

[GMAN]

I doubt if any court would take away your means to earn a living. Personally, I think that you are going to have some problems in your relationship if you pursue the post nuptial agreement. In fact, I doubt if it would be enforceable in most states, anyway. She probably feels that you have plans to split. That is what I would think. There are other ways to protect assets should something happen. If you are that concerned, you could always lease to own a truck. I am not talking about leasing something from a carrier to whom you may lease, but from a legitimate equipment leasing company. You can lease some equipment for up to 5 years. From your post I think you may suspect things are not as good in the relationship as would make you comfortable, whether that is coming from you or your wife.

[pigrider]

Believe it or not everything is good, matter of fact very good, but I have seen to many times where it is good or you think that it is good and some where alone the line something happens! I know people who have gotten a divorce after 20, 30 or even 40 years of marriage!

Maybe I do need to re-think this!

I am just a realist an I except life for what it is!!

Well she just walked past me with no affection or even a smile. (Smiling)

[9200IH]

I can't really comment on your situation but if I asked my wife that question she would be deeply hurt and then I would feel like a heel.

If I was going to get another line of work going I would need allot of help, if not physical or mental help at least moral support and if she knew that I didn't trust our marriage to stay together it wouldn't even be right to expect any help.

Re-think it.

Mike

[mommee]

Forgive my ignorance, but what is a post-nup? I haven't heard of it before.

Fredog-Congrats on 35yrs of marriage. Hope I last that long :wink:

[pigrider]

Forgive my ignorance, but what is a post-nup? I haven't heard of it before.

Fredog-Congrats on 35yrs of marriage. Hope I last that long :wink:

A post nupial is an agreement between a husband or wife in the event of a death or divorce. Just like a pre-nup, before marriage a post is after you are married.

[furbis]

you will be setting yourself up for a divorce in my opinion every time your wife sees that truck and trailer she will think about that post nup and get upset because you did not think your marriage would last.

I don't know if you were married in a Christian church or not but me and my wife were and during the service he says "and now you are ONE" which to me means there is no more mine and yours it is all OURS.

[Rev.Vassago]

GMAN is right, to an extent. A judge is not going to give your livelihood away to your ex, but at the same time, depending on what state you live in, you would owe your ex half the equity in the truck.

Example: Your truck is appraised at $60,000. You owe $30,000. You have $30,000 equity in the truck, of which your ex is entitled to 50%, or $15,000. Usually, this is offset with things that she keeps that have equity in them, such as a house, cars, etc.

[LOAD IT]

Pigrider- I am a man and I am going to take her side. Just listen to why I say shat I say. She has been with you for 15 years (which means she has been with you through the worst times), she isnt going to divorce you when you get trucker rich. Plus you arent worried about losing half, you only care about 1 truck-trailer. Let go of the 1 truck-trailer idea. If you lose it all, its not impossible to start over from 0 truck-trailer. A good educated woman is hard to find and you need to not jeopardize your relationship. Having a trucking business is going to test your relationship everyday. Do not ask her for the post-nuptial agreement. You should incorporate your business and if you are worried, then do not make her an officer of the company, but she can still take half of what you two acquired during the marriage, but the corporation and equipment owned by the corporation are protected.

DO NOT ASK HER TO SIGN THE AGREEMENT AND YOU WILL HAVE PEACE AND GET YOU A PIECE EVERY NOW AND THEN.

[beeiatch]

I say get a divorce and you"ll get a piece whenever you want, from who ever you want.

[pigrider]

I would like to thank everyone for their good, sound, and honest advice! I do not claim to know everything and I know that I love my wife very very much!

I will be apologizing to her!!

Thanks again!!!

[LOAD IT]

I would like to thank everyone for their good, sound, and honest advice! I do not claim to know everything and I know that I love my wife very very much!

I will be apologizing to her!!

Thanks again!!!

DONT TELL HER THAT YOU ARE TAKING MARITAL ADVICE FROM A BUNCH OF TRUCKERS OR YOU WILL HAVE OTHER PROBLEMS AT HOME.

[pigrider]

I would like to thank everyone for their good, sound, and honest advice! I do not claim to know everything and I know that I love my wife very very much!

I will be apologizing to her!!

Thanks again!!!

DONT TELL HER THAT YOU ARE TAKING MARITAL ADVICE FROM A BUNCH OF TRUCKERS OR YOU WILL HAVE OTHER PROBLEMS AT HOME.

(Laughing) You got that right!

[GTR SILVER]

unreal topic....................... :? :? :?