Harley-Davidson: The most efficient way to convert gasoline into noise without the adverse side effect of horsepower.

Did you know 95% of all Harleys are still on the road?
The other 5% actually made it home.

Is it true that Harleys are chick magnets?
Yes, but only if the chick has a steel plate in her head.

What's the cheapest way to get another 50hp from your Harley?
Trade it in on a Kawasaki.

Why don't Harley riders sit on their bikes when the sidestands are down?
They're afraid to lean over that far.

What's the difference between a Harley and a Harley owner's home?
The Harley costs more and has fewer wheels.

How do you now you're riding a Harley?
While coming off an exit-ramp you get passed by a Vespa.

Why don't Harley riders wave at sportbike riders?
Because they don't want to drop their tools.

How do you know all the aftermarket parts you bought for your Harley are worth the money?
You finally break into the 15's in the quarter mile.

Where can you find the world's largest collection of Harley jokes?
At Sturgis

What do you call a group of Harley Owners with a collective IQ of 120?
Sturgis!

How do Harley engineers tell if a bike is worthy of the Harley name?
They check to make sure the exhaust noise in decibels exceeds the horsepower rating.

Why don't Harley owners smile?
Once you realized you got conned into paying $25,000 for an outdated piece of $#!+ would YOU be smiling?

What's the difference between a Harley Davidson and a vacuum cleaner?
The location of the dirtbags.

Why do Harleys have fringe?
So you can tell if they're moving.

How do you know your Harley is handling great?
You can almost keep up with the logging trucks when you're riding in the
canyons.

How is a Harley Davidson like an old dog?
They both like to ride in the back of pickup trucks.

What is the difference between a Harley Davidson and an old dog?
The dog can get in the back of the pickup by itself.

Why couldn't the Harley mechanic repair the doorknob?
Some things just can't be fixed with only a hammer and a rope.

What's the difference between a Harley taken to Daytona on a trailer and one that's being ridden there?
The one on the trailer is going about 30mph faster.

Why do all Harley owners have trailers??
So they can go around corners faster!

You know you're a Harley rider if...

....you're unable to let your bike simply IDLE at a stop light.

....you confuse the word "character" with the more accurate term
"engineering flaws."

...."water cooled" means standing on the side of the road, in the rain, waiting for a your buddy to come in his pickup truck.

lULZ!!!!!!!!!!

Hey-

If it aint a Harley, it aint chit.

So, if it is a Harley, it is chit.

And this is probably enough bashing.

I really try to hold to the view that anybody who rides anything is part of the brotherhood.

I just wish more people still felt the same way.

Me personally, I just like the laid-back , riding style of most Harleys.
I'm sure there are lots of imports that have equivalent models, but I was never really able to get into the crotch-rocket thing.
Yes, you do have an excellent combination of speed and horsepower on those things, but wouldn't one get neck-cramps after being hunched over like that after awhile?

I agree...riding should be laid back. I have fond memories of Harleys from early childhood. I remember my mom telling me stories of her older brother riding up on a Harley when she was little and really sick...he was bringing her a coke. I remember riding in a car with mom when I was small and exclaiming "I hear a motorcycle" and she would close her eyes and say..."that's not a motorcycle...that's a HARLEY". It was my mom who taught me how to tell the difference in the sound of the pipes...plap, plap, plap...how you could feel it in your stomach...she is the one who taught me respect for the riders...I remember that once I got old enough, I dated a guy with a Harley. I figured mom hadn't ridden a Harley in a while so I asked him to take her out. She got on and he reached down and pulled her legs up to wrap around him and away they went...and when she came back, she looked happier than I had seen her in a while.

Not all Harley riders are good or the same....but, in my family, it's about the laid back ride and the togetherness and memories. I remember going to the Sacramento Mile (harley vs honda) and having a blast.

However, I have been known to attend any motocross that I can make it to!!

Everyone has their own reasons.....

I owned a Harley growing up. I sometimes wish that I still had it. I have owned other motorcycles since, but I think the Harley most fondly. There were a few years when Harley had some quality control issues, but as far as I know they have solved most of those problems. For some of you younger people, Harley Davidson was once known for their speed. I don't care for those motorcycles that you need to bend over to ride. I prefer a more casual way of riding where you can see the country. I do think the price is much too high. That and the previous quality control problems allowed Honda and others to gain a larger market share.

This is probably why I've been sort of alienated from people in my age group (20-30).
While all the "cool" kids were busy souping up their ricers and sneaking into the clubs, I was taking my bicycle to the abandoned, cement-quarry and snapping pictures.

My old sponsor (when i raced bmx) also owned a speed shop with his dad and they built the fastest drag Harley in 1986. I remember it had turbo(s?) and was faster than a raped ape. After setting the record, he ate poopoo trying to beat it on the Bonneville salt flats.

They can build some burly arse machines. he built my 300ex motor so tough I could hang with stock Raptors.

Harleys don't leak oil...they mark their territory!

Hahaha, like I should talk. I have a pretty clean '73 Honda CB350 :)