No Lot Lizards for This 'Ol Boy...
 

I wonder if his car is clean

:rolleyes: Figures... Michigan.....

OMG ..... now thats crazy for sure.

[QUOTE=Fredog;418773]I wonder if his car is clean[/QUOT

New treatment for crabs? Just Vacumn them off.

Hey you know what they say, you get what you pay for. Guy tried to get a b-job for 50 cents and looked what happened. Spend the money to do it right!:D

I've heard more, "AND BETTER" from California. I also know of a kid in WI that gave mew meaning to the term: "F#@$(%@ THE DOG". MI does not have the market cornered on WHACKOS. FL has their share too.

What are the charges? Indecent exposure? or taking liberties with a hoover?

Did he forget to add more change?

Maybe he just needs a shopvac at home.

I should think his family will know what to get him for Christmas this year.:p:D.

At least it didn't have teeth....................:eek::D:eek::D

I figure if he was THAT desperate...fifty-cents probably covered it.

Perhaps but the vaccum noise could have distracted him.:D.


Ya know, he could have Tennis elbow or Carpal Tunnel snydrome. Maybe he just has really rough hands that would have given himself chaffing. We really should pass judgement on this poor guy. I don't think he would have paid a slot machine if he could have taken care of it for free.;).


*laughing* (smilie STILL unavailable)

I don't think he was using the vacuum to pleasure himself? Living down here on the Ohio/West Virginia border it's not uncommon to hear of people using industrial power vacuums for shall we say a "male member enhancement tool". I think they are thinking that the more blood that is forced into a certain area might stretch as a result of holding more blood and increasing in size.

I have a feeling that's "FLAWED SCIENCE". More blood means larger? If that were true, do you have any idea just how many women would be using a "WATER-BALLOON" instead of a man? Fill a condom with water, and it will hold more than a gallon. Try to make a man match that.

But, I have a question for the guys on here that think they are "well-endowed".

What do you do with it when you go to a social event? Roll it up and put it in your pocket? Throw it over your shoulder and go as a "GAS PUMP"?

Your right, it doesn't work.

I don't know? How many women? Why would they be using a "water balloon"?

Science I am sure you will spend tons of time pondering...... eh? I reckon the same one's that need a water filled condom due to absense OF Man.....:p Sounds like something you've done a time or two..... Care to tell us why? No

Every guy line up and answer or you know what that means????

Why do you want to know they do with their junk? *wink*wink* :):D

i've dropped a water balloon condom on somebody before. they smelled like lube for a good chunk of the day. :p

A condom will hold a gallon of water??? Ewww.....

I can't imagine why that man would have done that...how embarassing to be busted like that!!!

When I lived in Omaha, the newsman came on one night with a story about a 19 year old being arrested for having "relations with a sow". No, he weren't doin a fat chick...

The south campus of Metro Community College in Omaha sat right next to a stock yard. Off duty OPD officer in there taking night classes went to his car to leave after class one night and heard strange noise coming from pen in stock yard. Grabbed flash light to investigate and found young man, pants and unders down around ankles going after it 'round back of large pig. Arrested. The guy on the news that night was damn near turning purple trying not to laugh on camera while relating story.

1 What else do I have to do when I'm out on the highway alone? Your mind can (and often does) go off on some strange tangents at times. And, the later it gets, the stranger the tangents.

2 image comes to mind of a pervert trying to sneak up behind a woman to see if he can burst the balloon and make all the water run down her legs...:p:D:D:D;)

3 Admittedly, I have. It gives you the HEAVIEST ARTILLERY in a water-balloon fight. But, it takes a great deal of care when you throw it to make sure it makes it to the "enemy" rather than bursting over your own head. (just spent the last five minutes, or more laughing at the memory of the last water-balloon fight. wipe away the tears and continue to write.) Attach a plastic ice-cream bucket to the end of a 2X4 by screwing the bottom to the side of the wood. A couple of concrete blocks, one on top of the other, and set the other end on that with about a foot and a half overhang. Step on the end and launch the water-filled condom at the enemy:D:D:D:D
Before I mounted mine to the wood, I cut 4 one inch holes into the bottom and used a torch to round off the edges of the plastic so it would not cut the condoms. A guy on the opposing team got wind of the condoms and went to CVS and bought a gross. Then he over-filled them. The first three of them got him completely drenched. Then, he copied m idea and forgot to put the holes in the bottom for air to get behind the "balloons". The 2X4 came up vertical, and the balloon simply dropped on his own head again.:D:D:D:D:D:D:D
I was laughing so hard, I could not move when they came over with a washtub full of water and dumped it on me.
There were times when we really did have fun when the kdis grew up but had not gotten married yet. We never did tell the girls that those REALLY BIG BALLOONS were condoms.

4 I had a floor load that was being unloaded in the Dallas/Ft Worth area. One of the guys on the dock was really enjoying himself by making comments about the sizes of the other guys' "blessings". It was sort of getting on everybody's nerves after a while, but he thought he was being funny.
He made the mistake of asking if anyone know what a guy with a 12" xxxx has for breakfast. No one knew, so he started laughing "HA HA HA, YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT I HAD FOR BREAKFAST".
I waited just a couple of minutes, then asked him that same question. Never even thought about it. It simply rolled off the tongue. What does a guy do for a social event... He gave me a blank stare and said "I don't know". "Another words, you don't know what you had for breakfast either." His face turned red and everybody else on the dock started laughing.

Some how WindWalker,

I am not surprised ...... but in case everyone else missed it.

I.... Was.... Right!!!! (said with musical overtones);).

Dam sometimes I really out do myself. Oh yeah back to what you said.
I have never had a condom water ballon fight. What a phucking waste of a condom. :p. Dude if I/We (husband and I) buy them,,,,
Hun they are going to be used the rightway.. You taking notes? You should.;):D.

My mind can wonder at any given moment, but then again the woman's mind can think and speak at rates far and above that of a man. It True.

Now do you want a shopvac for Christmas or not?:D:D:D:p:p:p:cool:.
The one with the most Horse Power and different sizes attachments.
I will be sure and pass it along to Santa for you. I am closer to the North you know.
I think you have been good this year?.? You have haven't you?:)

I would be willing to bet money that there are guys on this message board that have done the same thing, maybe not in public but someone reading this has probably stuck it in a vacuum cleaner.

NO!!! (*fingers in ears*) say it isn't so...please

I have three sons......

I am neither shocked or amazed. I can remember when they found it for the first time, I even remember when they would yank on it till they cried. ----Actually now that I think about it, it's the same thing. It probably hurt like hell, I mean come on( it hurts to have the vaccum pull on my hand) But think about it, Hair and sensitive parts....:eek: OUCHY!

And you can try to tell them " Hey don't touch that!" But they don't listen.


I learned then and I know now this to be true....

Golden Rule for men---A boy/man's first toy is his thingy....... and it remains his favorite toy.;).

Sad thing is grown men do the same thing.:D

Not all grown men,

That's what my husband has me for.;).:D.

I can honestly say I have never done so.
(I don't see a "WINGS AND HALO" smiley...)
The hose is too small...:roll:

I once thought that was one of the reasons I had a wife too. Found out I was wrong. So much for wives....:bigthumbsdown:
Name one food that makes a woman lose her sex-drive... WEDDING CAKE

Babe..... I haven't even gotten warmed up. Well, to be completely honest, I did get warmed up, at around 4:30am. That is how my husband likes to be woke up.......

I don't believe all men are the same, neither should you lump every woman into the same DAM Category.

okie dokie?

With the vibe you put out about how you think "WIFES" are I am not surprised you aren't getting any.

*TIP
My God mad man play hard to get, The chase is half the fun.... Nothing makes a WOMAN want you more then when she thinks she can't have you.
I know when my husband tells me NO, I work extra hard to change his mind.:nixon:. He knows this so he tells me No often.:smokin:
(I love the smilies)