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Why married truckers wifes come to this site
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       Trucking Forums Message Board, Truck Drivers Forums - Forum Index -> Family Support Forum
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Trukrswyfe



Joined: 13 Jul 2007
Posts: 1941

Posted: Sat Sep 01, 2007 11:16 am    Post subject: Why married truckers wifes come to this site  

So I started coming to this site to find info on this industry in which I knew absolutely nothing about. There is no one that I know personally that is married to a otr truck driver. OTR over the road. So what do you do when you want to find out about something you don't know, Google of course. Checked out quite a few sites but this one is so far the most informative and very interesting by far. Ive gone to the truckerwives site but these guys very funny.

I love reading the posts not just for their entertainment value but they do really teach you things. I love learning about something my husband is doing and I feel closer to him even though we aren't, physically that is.

Tips for the wives,
1. My husband loves it when I read the comic section to him especially at night when he is tired and needs to stay awake.
2. You also should make sure that you have picture phones and unlimited messaging, it is priceless. My kids don't do anything that isn't recorded and sent to him. In the beginning every meal was pictured and sent. That went both ways. He took the best pictures/videos of storms, floods, and snow . Also to give me great comfort his took pictures of wrecks and crashes to help me sleep at night. Ha ha I'm kidding he did take the pic but no they didn't help me sleep. Anyway love technology and it really helps when you are adjusting to not seeing your loved one everyday like you may be used to.

If there is anyone out there that has a husband considering or is newly out there and you have questions feel free to post.
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shyykatt



Joined: 06 Aug 2006
Posts: 2044
Location: MN

Posted: Sun Sep 02, 2007 6:58 pm    Post subject:  

Came here for the same reasons as you; to get info on the industry, and its also entertaining :)
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Ridge Runner



Joined: 18 Oct 2004
Posts: 2347
Location: North Ga.

Posted: Sun Sep 02, 2007 7:25 pm    Post subject:  

That's why I'm here. To keep all of you lonely trucker wives entertained. :lol:
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LilBit



Joined: 25 Apr 2005
Posts: 313
Location: Alabama, USA

Posted: Mon Sep 03, 2007 9:56 pm    Post subject:  

I came to this site back when my husband had went from a local driving job back to over the road and then really got in here when I was learning to drive myself and learning the ropes of it all...and now that I'm sitting back home while he's out and about I come here to keep up with all the things cause someday I want to be back out there again :)

I've gotten lots of support and advice, met quite a few on this site I've been glad that were here........this site was a good link for me when we were both otr and still is now that I'm sitting back home awhile :)
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Trukrswyfe



Joined: 13 Jul 2007
Posts: 1941

Posted: Tue Sep 04, 2007 11:45 pm    Post subject:  

Thank you Ridge that is mighty nice of you. However I really don't consider myself lonely, desperate maybe, lonely no.

I really just want to help calm fears of new driver's wives, or just answering their questions.

I'll start.

Every day will be a unique challenge for you if you aren't used to doing it all yourself. I guess I really didn't notice how much help my husband was till he was in a different time zone and of no help to me. When you do notice the things that you took for granted you should write them down and thank them. I wrote letters and sent pictures to him. I think guys like to feel both useful and appreciated.

Usually it's just like your talking to him at work. My husband worked the graveyard shift prior to this so I am used to him being gone at night.

We do not hang up on each other when one person is upset or having an attitude. Yes, this job is extremely dangerous and I don't ever want to have that be our last words to each other. When he does come home and there is some kind of disagreement, dont let him run to his truck till you have worked it out.

Just after my last post going to bed 11pm (my time, you will here that alot). "What time is it?" Your time or my time?" Anyway going to bed and husband called " That was a dead trucker" he says . "What ??!!" " He must have been going to fast because there was no weather to account, Driver side down at the top of Cabbage Hill with the guard rail going straight threw the windsheild. Good night honey sleep tight.
Yeah right.

I know why he does that, I think it is to make sure if I wasn't thinkin about him I would be now.

Again any ?? feel free??
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Ridge Runner



Joined: 18 Oct 2004
Posts: 2347
Location: North Ga.

Posted: Tue Sep 04, 2007 11:54 pm    Post subject:  

Just kidding around Trukswyfe. I do know how hard your jobs are at home. Whilr I was away OTR my wife replaces a water heater and a dishwasher. She handles al of our rental property by herself andd makes sure the kids are well taken care of. ( Kids are a large part of her time ). My hat is off to you ladies that take care of the home-front while we are away. I'm local now but she stil takes care of most things around here.
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Trukrswyfe



Joined: 13 Jul 2007
Posts: 1941

Posted: Wed Sep 05, 2007 12:23 am    Post subject:  

I guess there isn't any new truck drivers wives that come to this site oh well.
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Trukrswyfe



Joined: 13 Jul 2007
Posts: 1941

Posted: Sat Sep 15, 2007 10:58 am    Post subject:  

This is a nightmare that trucker's wives must fear the most. When my husband called to tell me of this accident at 11:00pm PST I prayed and prayed for that man's family. Do not fight with your spose while on the road or if you do make up before you end the call.



This still make me cry when I see it.
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dle



Joined: 03 Jan 2005
Posts: 702
Location: Texas

Posted: Sat Sep 15, 2007 12:11 pm    Post subject:  

You may have already seen this site but just in case

http://www.loads.org/
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Cheryle



Joined: 02 Oct 2007
Posts: 17
Location: MIchigan

Posted: Thu Oct 04, 2007 7:39 pm    Post subject: Why i came to this site  

I came to this site to find out how other wives of truck drivers cope with the time away from their husbands. How to learn to adjust. My husband has gone off and on since the end of July. That includes the two week course out of state and driving with the trainer.

I guess i just wanted to know that there were other women out there feeling the same way I do. Learn how to deal with the time apart. We talk alot on the phone. We actually talk more than we used to talk when he was home. But the voice over the phone doesnt replace him sleeping next to me every night.

I have 2 cats and a dog so I am not "alone"--but it is not the same.

It has been a hard adjustment for sure. For him too. He gets lonely. Seems to be a bit easier for him as time goes on. I dont hear "I miss you" as much on the phone as I used to. But when he is home he tells me how much he missed me while he was gone.

I know I am rambling, but I am new to the whole forum thing too. I will try not to ramble as much next time.

Thank you for being here [b][/b]
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Ridge Runner



Joined: 18 Oct 2004
Posts: 2347
Location: North Ga.

Posted: Fri Oct 05, 2007 6:28 am    Post subject:  

You go ahead and ramble all you want. Sometimes that is just what the Doctor ordered. :wink:
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PyxieRin



Joined: 08 Aug 2007
Posts: 7

Posted: Fri Oct 05, 2007 9:47 am    Post subject: Re: Why i came to this site  

Cheryle wrote: I came to this site to find out how other wives of truck drivers cope with the time away from their husbands. How to learn to adjust. My husband has gone off and on since the end of July. That includes the two week course out of state and driving with the trainer.

I guess i just wanted to know that there were other women out there feeling the same way I do. Learn how to deal with the time apart. We talk alot on the phone. We actually talk more than we used to talk when he was home. But the voice over the phone doesnt replace him sleeping next to me every night.

I have 2 cats and a dog so I am not "alone"--but it is not the same.

It has been a hard adjustment for sure. For him too. He gets lonely. Seems to be a bit easier for him as time goes on. I dont hear "I miss you" as much on the phone as I used to. But when he is home he tells me how much he missed me while he was gone.

I know I am rambling, but I am new to the whole forum thing too. I will try not to ramble as much next time.

Thank you for being here

I am new to this whole forum thing too.......I come here mostly for the company info, it helps me to understand what he is talking about. My hubby just started trucking he is half way through his 6 weeks with a trainer. I just never know what to ask to get my point across. :oops: I do have a problem though if anyone has suggestions. How can I help him get over being nervous about going it alone for the first time. He says he doesn't worry now because the trainer is right there. He is flatbedding so he is worried about load securement and says he still can't get the shifting right...... Any ideas??
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Trukrswyfe



Joined: 13 Jul 2007
Posts: 1941

Posted: Fri Oct 05, 2007 7:15 pm    Post subject:  

PyxieRin,

Welcome to forum and I am glad to be of help. Idea for your husband, If he has a cell phone put it to good use and start adding contacts. Both his trainer and fellow students could really come in handy for him in the evenings when he may really need it. Depending on where he runs and what he is hauling we also have road side and other numbers programmed in for immediate help. for the upcoming weather there are numbers that you can call in each state for pass reports and again I would encourage your husband to have those dialed into the phone. I also keep various site in my favorites to get the current weather and road conditions for him. I check on the during the day and since I know his route or atleast the general area he is in ( especially the passes) and let him know about weather, construction, and or accidents he may encounter. This is one way to stay connected and relevant to your husband. He will find you essential and you both will have lots to talk about. If you go to eflying j on line you can order him a blue tooth parrot road kind head set that is hands free and cuts down on the road noise on your end. This will make talking less hazardous but still avoid talking too much when he is driving, him being new it could be too distracting. So not as to interupt his sleeping and or training I shoot him a text message" U Up" then he calls if he can talk. Thsi will help him get the neccessary sleep he needs for those long days.

My husband is himself a trainer and makes sure his students know that they can call him anytime they need. That being said my husband drives the evening and sometimes is sleeping when they call so have back up numbers that he can also use. People my husband went to school with still call him in a bind usually the evening for help with whatever. Truthfully with trucking everyday can have some many bumps, turns, and hiccups. We just try to laugh any say atleast it isn't boring.

As far as the shifting goes my husband has a guy that he had to tell shift, shift, over and over for quite some time. Their truck had a shift indicator but this student still required more help. Hope your husband's trainer is that patient. Truthfully I have to remind him that not everyone is as gifted as him and may need more help. Once he gets it though he probably will always have it. I have a load more help if you have specific questions other wise I could go on and on and on. :D
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Trukrswyfe



Joined: 13 Jul 2007
Posts: 1941

Posted: Fri Oct 05, 2007 7:41 pm    Post subject:  

Hello Cheryle,

Sorry I didn't respond right away it has been almost a month since I started this post and almost gave up. A big Welcome to you and your animals. I have three sons one dog and one cat. Of all of them I am the only female thank goodness for my five sisters.

Lets see if I can help. Nothing I say will fill the void your husband being gone has left but... it will get easier I promise One thing that really helped me in the beginning was find something to do to relieve stress or tension. With you husband gone one finds themself alittle more pent up then before. Exercise! Not sure if that is for you but I start walking and lifting weights so that in the month that your husband is away he may notice a change. Just an idea that helped me, less stress felt good about myself and well lets just say my husband felt good about myself too. Its a win win.


As far as being gone alot and sleeping alone, my husband worked graveyard for years so to me it is normal to have a bed all to myself. There are some many things I could say. I was an emotional roller coaster for the first few months some days I was fine with him being gone and other days I was a wreck, luckily I had to suck it up for the sake of my kids.

By the way where are you from? I am in Washington State I am, I just turned 30, I stay at home. My name is Charity, I hope I helped. Not sure if any of this is viable help but I have other suggestion that could let me know. See if going with your husband is possible that might be a real treat. BOL
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shyykatt



Joined: 06 Aug 2006
Posts: 2044
Location: MN

Posted: Fri Oct 05, 2007 7:50 pm    Post subject:  

Took me a long time to get used to being a 'truckers wife' as well; I've always been fairly independent, so it hasn't been quite as hard as I thought it would be. We don't have kids- just critters- they keep me busy. As far as sleeping alone- yeah that really sucks, but I am so used to it that when he comes home, I would rather he go sleep in the truck (j/k!) He is gone a month or more at a time these days, but we talk often.
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