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single mom w/10 year old
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       Trucking Forums Message Board, Truck Drivers Forums - Forum Index -> Women In Trucking
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Cynduck



Joined: 12 Oct 2005
Posts: 59
Location: Akron, Ohio

Posted: Wed Mar 28, 2007 10:10 am    Post subject:  

Amen Coastie!

When my husband first started driving I put up a huge map in the family room of the US. We tracked his routes and would mark where he stopped etc. My kids all had US maps and colored in the state every time daddy went there for the first time. We could have sat here whining and missing him (which we missed him tons) but turned around and used it for something positive instead. Life is all in how you look at it.

It would be tough to take a 10year old out on the road but what a wonderful experience it could be. I think back to spending my summers in the car with my mom (she delivered molds in a pick up truck for my dad's machine shop) Sometimes it was really boring but I could get anywhere when I started driving and was never afraid of getting lost. I have always appreciated that experience especially when my friends would have no idea how to even get to the local mall.
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Sheepdancer



Joined: 31 Jan 2006
Posts: 1353

Posted: Wed Mar 28, 2007 10:20 am    Post subject:  

That is what vacations are for.
It wasnt being negative. I just think the thought of a kid being cooped up in a truck is sad. Kids need to run around, interact with someone besides lot lizards, hang out with people their own age, play sports, ride a bike....ect. Hell, even when I take my kids on a long vacation, I take the time to stop every few hours so they can play. Seeing some historical place through a windsheild is not much better than looking at a picture of it online or in a book.
Just for you I will change my comment.
Kid: Mom, look at that....CANNONS! What is that place?
Mom: That is where they fought part of the Civil war. Remember, you read about it.
Kid: Cool....Can we stop?
Mom: No....watch another movie.
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coastie



Joined: 09 Mar 2007
Posts: 421
Location: Elberton, Ga

Posted: Wed Mar 28, 2007 10:28 am    Post subject:  

Sheepdancer still negativity will get no where, All you and may others are so negative. Why not get to stop? She'll need a break time to time any way. True not every 5 minutes but I always stopped for a few minutes evry 2 or 3 hours.

Why is it everyone wants to tell otehrs how to raise their kids? If she wants to take them fine have a ball. If you want to be away from your, fine it's your life. I always enjoyed being with my Dad at work or where ever. He was not driving anymore but he did work for a Trucking company and I would go with himn sit in his office and watched him load the trucks. I had a blast.

Kids to day are more into video games anyway. by him going out on the road, he'll learn more than joe Blows kid in School..

To add more to this, I do know a guy who will take his kids out on trips. His kids are home schooled and he has 3. Each week he may take one out with him and they have a blast also. The learn and get to spend with their father. He not like most OTR Drivers, leaves out Sunday Night, and back by Tuesday. Off again Wed night and back Friday or Saterday morning. But the point is the kids love it, and they are getting an education.
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Sheepdancer



Joined: 31 Jan 2006
Posts: 1353

Posted: Wed Mar 28, 2007 10:55 am    Post subject:  

Of course she will get to stop and take breaks. Many truck stops will be visited, many rest areas. Personally, those are two places I dont like to even take my kids near when I am in a car.
Not all kids are into video games that much. Sure limited time on video games is fine, however a parent needs to still get the kid to be active or the kid will get chubby.
Think about all the news articles today about kids being overweight. Now, think about why? The reason is that many kids arent active enough. Too many video games not enough running around acting crazy after school or riding a bike. At least kids in school have PE. Homeschooled kids still have playing outside after school. A kid living in a truck has what for exercize? You see truck drivers on this board complaining about gaining weight because sitting in a truck all day isnt being active enough. What do you suppose that will do to a kid?
Let me say, that I dont think their is anything wrong with a kid going a couple of weeks during the summer with his truck driver parent. In fact, I think its a great thing. But 2 to 3 weeks out, 2 days home all year????
BORDERLINE CHILD ABUSE. Basically, it comes down to this. Your kid, you made him, do with him what you want. However you did come out here and ask for advice. So we are giving it.

A few other things to think about:
1. Out of hours in West Memphis and have to stay in one of those wonderful truck stops.
2. Delivery in South Central LA at night.
3. Making a delivery at some warehouse, something is wrong with the bills and you have to go inside for a while....ooops they dont allow 10 year olds in the warehouse.
4. " Mommy, why does that guy keep talking about no panties on the CB"
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Twilight Flyer



Joined: 13 Nov 2002
Posts: 5738

Posted: Wed Mar 28, 2007 10:59 am    Post subject:  

Cyduck, there is a big difference between home-schooling at HOME and attempting to home-school while driving a truck. When a person home-schools, they do so in the home...that person does not have to worry dealing with their job. Their job is teaching their children and they can devote their home-schooling time to their child. That's the whole reason the system was set up.

When you talk about homeschooling in a truck, we are not even talking about a team here, where one person drives and the other teaches. We are talking about a single mom that will be spending the bulk of her days, DRIVING and doing her job. Where on earth is she going to find the time to actually home-school and do an effective job of it?!?

I know people that home-school and I applaud them for it. But it's a lot of work. You don't just turn your child loose on a computer and let them learn. Homeschooling requires a lot of interaction between the parent/teacher. That's why/how homeschooling can be so successful. But it absolutely will not happen in a truck when mom/teacher is spending her day doing her job.

And no one has even broached the subject of safety. I won't even get into the potential distractions associated with attempting to do this.

Quote: Kids to day are more into video games anyway. by him going out on the road, he'll learn more than joe Blows kid in School..

What do you think he's going to be doing for the majority of the time while mom is driving?!? :roll:

Once again, the original poster needs to contact D.H.S. and see what they think about home-schooling on the road. Right or wrong, they can and they HAVE taken children away from parents for doing just that. Would you risk that with your children? If not, then why are you advising someone else to do it with their own child?
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Sheepdancer



Joined: 31 Jan 2006
Posts: 1353

Posted: Wed Mar 28, 2007 11:06 am    Post subject:  

Lets look at another way......
Most Dangerous job list and number of deaths per 100,000
Timber cutters 117.8----- Are you going to take your kid to work with you everyday?
Commercial Fishers 71.1....Is an alaskan fishing boat a great place for a kid to spend everyday?
Pilots and navigators 69.8...Sure kids fly.....but they dont live in a plane everyday.
Structural metal workers 58.2....Are you going to take your kid up on the gurders of a 50 story building?
Roofers 37 ..>Sure, a kid would have fun on a roof, but let him stay up there 8 hours a day, eventually he will fall.
Electrical power installers 32.5....Drop and roll son, drop and roll....I told you not to touch the red wire!
Farm occupations 28...Sure 10 year olds farm....I will give you this one.
Truck drivers 25....Need I say more?
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Sheepdancer



Joined: 31 Jan 2006
Posts: 1353

Posted: Wed Mar 28, 2007 11:15 am    Post subject:  

Once again I will say that I think its a great idea to take a kid with you for a few weeks a year. When I was a kid I would have loved it. But two weeks is a lot different than spending all their time in a truck.

Now, I have spent very little time in a truck. However just reading some of the amazing stories of things that have happened to you drivers out on the road is very entertaining. Some of the road stories you have are funny and even a little bit scary to an adult. Im amazed at some of the things that have happened to you all. However the thought of some of those things happening in the pressence of a 10 year old kid is HORRIFYING. You have to admit the trucking industry is at best "Rated R"
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Twilight Flyer



Joined: 13 Nov 2002
Posts: 5738

Posted: Wed Mar 28, 2007 12:24 pm    Post subject:  

Quote: You have to admit the trucking industry is at best "Rated R"

And usually NC-17. :shock:
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Cynduck



Joined: 12 Oct 2005
Posts: 59
Location: Akron, Ohio

Posted: Wed Mar 28, 2007 12:27 pm    Post subject:  

Twilight I agree with you - there's a HUGE differece. I don't think it is a good idea at all. She asked for ways that it might be able to work. I would never do it but it isn't my place to tell her that she can't do that with her child. I think it could be done with a lot of work but it would be very difficult to manage. There are curriculums out there that are teacher taught on DVD - it's not turning your child loose on a computer but it would allow her to drive while he is getting the classroom lectures. It's not something I use but is the only way I see a chance of her being able to drive and her son still getting an education. Homeschooling is so much more then sitting at the table in front of a stack of books.

Is it the ideal situation in a truck? Far from it. :( Would I allow one of my children to live in a truck full time? Not a chance! Will my children go out with my husband from time to time? You bet.

Like I said before - they would be missing the opportunity to be in a co-op and get the interaction with other children. Homeschooling is one of the toughest things I have ever done but it is so worth it. If she is set on doing it, I was offering advice on the best way to be able to give her child an education. I think the child would be very lonely though.

I just re-read Twilights last post and something came to mind. Besides all the other negatives already mentioned - how many out of the house jobs would permit you to attempt to homeschool your child while you were working? I know how much time homeschooling takes. I am finishing my college degree, raising 4 kids (1 with severe disabilities), homeschooling and caring for my house. There is no way I could homeschool and hold down a full time job at the same time and we all know that truck driving is beyond a full time job.
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Shebear



Joined: 12 Jun 2006
Posts: 103

Posted: Wed Mar 28, 2007 12:42 pm    Post subject: Other Factors  

Applause for you, Mom! At ten years of age, your daughter may be mature enough to make the best of OTR living. Only you know her character and the strength of your relationship. If she's the type of child who can work alone on her schoolwork and be happy without having a crowd of kids around, it COULD work.

But it sounds like you haven't gone to a truck school or community college yet to get your CDL. After that is taken care of, you're going to have to go on the road for a couple of months with a trainer, 24/7, knocking yourself out. As a woman who tried that last part, and has failed so far, I can only advise you not to "burn your bridges".

Where will your daughter be staying during that time? Will she be safe with relatives? Are you SURE nobody else wants custody?

And last but not at all least. . .

What are your morals? Single Mom EQUALS Easy Mark. You do not want to subject your daughter to damaging situations.

I was raised by a single mother in the best neighborhood in the world -- a nice, decent apartment in Beverly Hills, California. My life was hell, because my mother was a poor working woman who just liked male company once in a while, and who can blame her. I found certain times to be very unpleasant. People forget these days that children are not supposed to be raised to be voyeurs. Things like that affect them. "Mom" is supposed to be SPECIAL.

There's another risk. I was fortunate, because at your daughter's age, I was able to repel the slugs who were eyeing me behind my mother's back. These days, a lot more vermin come out of the closet.

Over-The-Road is not the place for a little girl. A lot of BIG GIRLS drive with BIG DOGS for a reason.

Sorry to be blunt. If you are secure in yourself, not a patsy, clean-living, and watch over her LIKE A HAWK - you'll be just fine.

But when she's ready for high school, then what? Time flies.
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coastie



Joined: 09 Mar 2007
Posts: 421
Location: Elberton, Ga

Posted: Wed Mar 28, 2007 5:18 pm    Post subject:  

And we wonder why Our kids are getting so bad now. Or the thread about america falling, Look how we mistreat our kids.
We do not educate them any more, we tell them what we want them to know, but not the true history, we make them think they can do what ever they want and get by with it. So they do, steal, Use drugs, and murder.

Why cause we do not want to spend time with them not do things together, such as bring them out with us on the road, can not punish them for it's child abuse.

Really Sad.

Have a nice life..
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Twilight Flyer



Joined: 13 Nov 2002
Posts: 5738

Posted: Thu Mar 29, 2007 10:32 am    Post subject:  

Bringing a child out on the road for short periods of time is great...it's a wonderful learning experience and allows the parent and child to spend time together. I think many people have pointed that out.

Bringing them out on the road to live in a truck and attempt to home-school on the road, is wrong. Period. What kind of a homelife would the child have, living in a truck 24/7? With a parent that certainly means well, but would have absolutely no chance to successfully homeschool her child and do her job at the same time.

It's been said over and over again. If you don't agree with it, fine. That's your choice. But before you encourage someone to risk losing their child, perhaps you should ask yourself if you would risk your own.
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yoopr



Joined: 01 Dec 2004
Posts: 12865

Posted: Thu Mar 29, 2007 11:46 am    Post subject:  

coastie wrote: And we wonder why Our kids are getting so bad now. Or the thread about america falling, Look how we mistreat our kids.
We do not educate them any more, we tell them what we want them to know, but not the true history, we make them think they can do what ever they want and get by with it. So they do, steal, Use drugs, and murder.

Why cause we do not want to spend time with them not do things together, such as bring them out with us on the road, can not punish them for it's child abuse.

Really Sad.

Have a nice life..

Have you even started driving truck yet?
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joettanne



Joined: 05 Oct 2005
Posts: 75
Location: Ontario, Canada

Posted: Thu Mar 29, 2007 6:36 pm    Post subject:  

Do yourself and your child a favour. If you really want to drive a truck, get a local job. Keep your child in school. Come home every night and cook supper. When your child is finished school and on their own. Then go on the road full time.
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Shawnee



Joined: 05 Nov 2006
Posts: 246
Location: Canada

Posted: Sun Apr 01, 2007 4:15 pm    Post subject:  

coastie wrote: Sheepdancer still negativity will get no where, All you and may others are so negative. Why not get to stop? She'll need a break time to time any way. True not every 5 minutes but I always stopped for a few minutes evry 2 or 3 hours.

Why is it everyone wants to tell otehrs how to raise their kids? If she wants to take them fine have a ball. If you want to be away from your, fine it's your life. I always enjoyed being with my Dad at work or where ever. He was not driving anymore but he did work for a Trucking company and I would go with himn sit in his office and watched him load the trucks. I had a blast. .

Nobody is being negative, everyone is entitled to his or her opinion, that is the whole reason for this forum. A lot of these people have been in this industry for a long time and know what they are talking about. Nobody is telling anyone how to raise kids, just giving advice,

I also rode with my Dad in the truck on school breaks but it is not the same as living in a truck full time. I had even been to some places with my dad that did not allow children and I had to hide in the bunk.

I don't know about you but I have never had time to stop and go sightseeing, let alone find somewhere to park to go sightseeing driving a truck. I rarely have time to do anything other than eat and sleep while I am working, imagine that life for a child, think about it this way, would you like to have spent your childhood that way.
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