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Random_Facts
Joined: 06 Mar 2006
Posts: 554
Location: Northern California
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| Posted: Tue Oct 03, 2006 2:09 am Post subject: Have any kids? Might want to listen to this Lol. |
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23 Dangerous Child Facts
1. A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill 2000 sq. foot house 4 inches deep.
2. If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.
3. A 3-year-old's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.
4. If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42 pound boy wearing Batman underwear and a superman cape. It is strong enough, however, if tied to a paint can, to spread paint on all four walls of a 20 by 20 foot room.
5. You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on. When using the ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.
6. The glass in windows (even double pane) doesn't stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.
7. When you hear the toilet flush and the words "Uh-oh," it's already too late.
8. Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.
9. A six year old can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36 year old man says they can only do it in the movies. A magnifying glass can start a fire even on an overcast day.
10. Certain LEGOs will pass through the digestive tract of a four-year-old.
11. Play Dough and Microwave should never be used in the same sentence.
12. Super glue is forever.
13. No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you still can't walk on water.
14. Pool filters do not like Jell-O.
15. VCR's do not eject PB & Jam sandwiches even though TV commercials show that they do.
16. Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.
17. Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.
18. You probably do not want to know what that odor is.
19. Always look in the oven before you turn it on. Plastic toys do not like ovens.
20. The local fire department has a 5-minute response time.
21. The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy.
22. It will however make cats dizzy.
23. Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy. |
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JR OTR
Joined: 01 Aug 2006
Posts: 33
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| Posted: Tue Oct 03, 2006 10:14 am Post subject: Re: Have any kids? Might want to listen to this Lol. |
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Random_Facts wrote: 23 Dangerous Child Facts
1. A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill 2000 sq. foot house 4 inches deep.
Do a little math before you post crap like that here, please. A king size waterbed can't fill a 10x20 room four inches deep much less a house 10x that size. |
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Twilight Flyer
Joined: 13 Nov 2002
Posts: 5486
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| Posted: Tue Oct 03, 2006 12:31 pm Post subject: |
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| Dude, it's a joke. And it's funny. Lighten up a bit. |
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Windwalker
Joined: 22 Oct 2005
Posts: 2773
Location: Holiday, FL
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| Posted: Tue Oct 03, 2006 2:41 pm Post subject: |
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And, be sure not to try any of these at home.....
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: |
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Twilight Flyer
Joined: 13 Nov 2002
Posts: 5486
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| Posted: Tue Oct 03, 2006 3:14 pm Post subject: |
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| My kids have tried a few of those. Heck, I think I've tried a few of them. :) |
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PhuzzyGnu
Joined: 15 Jul 2005
Posts: 286
Location: Planet Houston
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| Posted: Tue Oct 03, 2006 5:23 pm Post subject: |
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Actually, a king size waterbed might fill a 2000 sqaure foot house about .14" deep.
(yes I'm bored)
-p. |
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Jackrabbit379
Joined: 22 Oct 2005
Posts: 4741
Location: Wichita Falls,Tx
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| Posted: Wed Oct 04, 2006 2:14 am Post subject: |
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| Well,the one about the 3 year old being louder,than a crowded restraunt....man,that aint no lie :shock: |
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Random_Facts
Joined: 06 Mar 2006
Posts: 554
Location: Northern California
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| Posted: Wed Oct 04, 2006 5:05 am Post subject: |
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Jackrabbit379 wrote: Well,the one about the 3 year old being louder,than a crowded restraunt....man,that aint no lie :shock:
Or worse, You have a long day, you just want to get home like now (yesterday even). You get a flight you're like ok whew I'm safe, Next thing you know a baby is behide you and is Crying there head off. Now that's Just Crazy right there lol. Not me I perfer to drive anyday... =D |
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heavenbound
Joined: 27 Mar 2002
Posts: 1529
Location: humble, texas
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| Posted: Wed Oct 04, 2006 5:30 pm Post subject: |
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Jackrabbit379 wrote: Well,the one about the 3 year old being louder,than a crowded restraunt....man,that aint no lie :shock:
Try one that burps out loud and everyone turns and looks at us (cause it was a good one) i said good girl but not in public, then my wife hits me upside the head and says "she get's that from you".
I'll never forget that evening out. Daddy's little girl. :D |
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