A Serious Question ( about men)

[movinit]

I consider someone to be romantic by sharing my interests as much as they want me to share in theirs. I love to hunt so someone who can shoot as good as I do and doesn't squeal is romantic.

[RebelDarlin]

Do you guys think your parents relationships come into play here? We learn by example. Any relationship is going to get tested at some point. I think we either try to get along or try to break up. Kinda like deciding to be happy or sad. It is a choice. Some relationships just werent right but some that fail could have been saved with a different mindset. I guess I dont relate to romance per se. My wife and I just get along and we like each other. We try not to hurt each other. We always know we want to be together and we tell each other that. Just talking out loud here Reb, not sure how to answer your question. I'm not much help around the house. I do all the guy stuff and I'm responsible but not much on cooking, cleaning, laundry so I dont think thats the answer.

Good point Snowman! My Dad was a trucker, not around a lot. Me, I've always worked so I'm not around a lot either. My only marriage (many years ago and quite brief) was a disaster and since then I don't think I've taken any relationship serious enough to contemplate trying to make it last. It was pretty much take me as I am or there's the door. They were a 'convenience' so to speak. But recently I find myself in new territory and am at a loss as to how to proceed. My best friend calls me 'relationship r-e-t-a-r-d-ed', and she's pretty much nailed me with that one. I don't have a clue!

[matcat]

To be philosophical here...

Love is nothing that can be quantified with any formula, specific set of actions, or even by logic! Love is an emotion, however relationships are real and quantifiable. Relationships based on love can be very complicated because emotion and logic don't mix. What works in a relationship depends solely on the two people involved. I honestly don't think a relationship can truly last on love alone. This is why I think a lot of people get married and find out that life afterwards is completely different then before. As I already said, love is an emotion, it can cause two people to be attracted, which will start a relationship, but it will not hold one together. Relationships take work, they take sacrifice, and they take understanding both yourself and the other person. After marriage it is more then just love, the act of marriage itself is a commitment that the two will join their lives together! This means all the responsibilities of life are now joined together.

You need to keep your relationship alive and healthy in order to keep your love alive and healthy in relation to that relationship.

This is one of the reasons why I have never persued a serious relationship, because I can hardly be responsable for my own life, let alone anyone elses. I have experienced the emotion of love plenty of times, but never put much effort into the relationship aspect of it. Not that I don't think I could, but because in reality I am just not responsable enough for it. Although the older I get, the more I start to regret some of my choices...

At either rate, I just wanted to do a little philosophical ranting, I haven't done much philosphical writing in a long time, and for some reason today I felt the desire too. Perhaps that happy pill last night does have a lingering effect...

[BlooMoose]

Do you guys think your parents relationships come into play here? We learn by example. Any relationship is going to get tested at some point. I think we either try to get along or try to break up. Kinda like deciding to be happy or sad. It is a choice. Some relationships just werent right but some that fail could have been saved with a different mindset. I guess I dont relate to romance per se. My wife and I just get along and we like each other. We try not to hurt each other. We always know we want to be together and we tell each other that. Just talking out loud here Reb, not sure how to answer your question. I'm not much help around the house. I do all the guy stuff and I'm responsible but not much on cooking, cleaning, laundry so I dont think thats the answer.

As Reb said, you are probably on to something.

[amandaholder]

I am really bad at this kind of stuff (obviously why I'm still single at 50)! What do men consider 'romantic'? I don't mean sexy, I can figure that part out, but what is romantic to a man. Or do they even want, or need, romance?

men dont want romance,just sex, that's why I have a girlfriend, she knows how to be romantic

[matcat]

men dont want romance,just sex, that's why I have a girlfriend, she knows how to be romantic

I have to disagree with that. Sex is great, but it is not everything. All the sexual partners I have had that didn't involve any real love to me where just empty and meaningless encounters.

It could just be I am getting older and see things differently though...

[Rev.Vassago]

men dont want romance,just sex, that's why I have a girlfriend, she knows how to be romantic

Wow. What a bigot.

[BlooMoose]

Wow. What a bigot.

LOL. I have nearly come to that conclusion, myself...maybe what I need is a good wife...

[matcat]

LOL. I have nearly come to that conclusion, myself...maybe what I need is a good wife...

No you don't need a wife!!!

[BlooMoose]

No you don't need a wife!!!

ROFLMAO!! Tell me what I need, mat

[matcat]

After I get done doing this ton of paperwork I let pile up :P

[BlooMoose]

[RebelDarlin]

Ok I found this and it seems to fit:

What Men Want - How to Romance a Man - Redbook



BTW Jumbo you rock! Your original list is almost exactly what he said!

[wimpy]

If I may say, it may or may not be romantic to you but it is to me when my girlfriend does things for me when I don't even ask her to do it. Such as make my lunch, come snuggle next to me while I'm sleeping (lets me know I'm wanted), gives me unexpected back/leg rubs! Those texts that you get once in a while stating "I just wanted to let you know I love you", those kinds of texts just hit the spot! So for me overall it's when you get/receive something without even expecting it.

[Fredog]

ROFLMAO!! Tell me what I need, mat

you need to quit playing on the internet and go haul another load.

[dobry4u]

you need to quit playing on the internet and go haul another load.

Now that is romantic!

[matcat]

now that is romantic!

rofl!

[jonp]

Romance is when I come home from 4 or 5 days on the road and my girlfriend has left a six-pack of my favorite beer in the fridge and she hates beer. For Valentines day one year my girlfriend left me a bottle of brandy and $5 to buy bait to go ice fishing. One year while I was at hunting camp she came out and when I came in for supper she was there with a fresh baked lasgagne. Very romantic for me without her having to say a thing. I'm serious.

Women and men look at romance and their relationship from entirely different perspectives. This is why for a women to expect a man to say I love you every day is not realistic. Men are more apt to demonstrate their love with concrete actions and not say it alot. One summer my girlfriend of a few years told me out of the blue that I never said I love you to her. My reply: Huh? Hell, I just took two weeks off work and roofed your house! Women are more cerebral and men more physical about love and sex. It's the way that we are wired.

Small things like the beer or putting up with his blow-em-up movies without making a fuss are romantic to us. The remark about the slinky lace and the women thinking she is being romantic and the man just thinking that he is about to get some is dead on the mark. We are just different.

[GTR SILVER]

To be philosophical here...

Love is nothing that can be quantified with any formula, specific set of actions, or even by logic! Love is an emotion, however relationships are real and quantifiable. Relationships based on love can be very complicated because emotion and logic don't mix. What works in a relationship depends solely on the two people involved. I honestly don't think a relationship can truly last on love alone. This is why I think a lot of people get married and find out that life afterwards is completely different then before. As I already said, love is an emotion, it can cause two people to be attracted, which will start a relationship, but it will not hold one together. Relationships take work, they take sacrifice, and they take understanding both yourself and the other person. After marriage it is more then just love, the act of marriage itself is a commitment that the two will join their lives together! This means all the responsibilities of life are now joined together.

You need to keep your relationship alive and healthy in order to keep your love alive and healthy in relation to that relationship.

This is one of the reasons why I have never persued a serious relationship, because I can hardly be responsable for my own life, let alone anyone elses. I have experienced the emotion of love plenty of times, but never put much effort into the relationship aspect of it. Not that I don't think I could, but because in reality I am just not responsable enough for it. Although the older I get, the more I start to regret some of my choices...

At either rate, I just wanted to do a little philosophical ranting, I haven't done much philosphical writing in a long time, and for some reason today I felt the desire too. Perhaps that happy pill last night does have a lingering effect...

spoke'n like a true "trucker"...just kidding.......very well put

there is a saying..."know thy self"...if we are to self consumed..how can we know our partner...???
just my 1 cent.....

[matcat]

spoke'n like a true "trucker"...just kidding.......very well put

there is a saying..."know thy self"...if we are to self consumed..how can we know our partner...???
just my 1 cent.....

Are you saying I am self consumed?!?