I'm finally on my own...

[RebelDarlin]

My youngest moved out this weekend. I now have the house all to myself for the first time in my life. arty: (except for her cats that she can't take to her new apartment.) :shock: :rock: :rock: :rock:

Reb

I already changed the lock on the front door and boy is she mad!

[mommee]

I have no idea what that feels like and won't for a long time. I always "barge in" at my parents house. I still have the key to the front door :wink:. They enjoy the grandkids and I get to rest a little. I get to take a long well deserved nap.

Party time for you.

[Drew10]

Congrats RD....Dont have the empty nest feeling :wink: ???

I already changed the lock on the front door and boy is she mad!

:shock:
I guess not....

[Ratdog]

RebelDarlin, It was that way for my wife and I, but my step daughter is temporarily back and we have the grandson too. Her husband is in the Army. It's funny how they get mad when you change the locks, but like I've told them, you are always welcome to come by, as long as we are home.. The funny thing about that is, you need to search them going out the door, my MT. Dew would be gone all the time!

[RebelDarlin]

The reason the lock was changed was she came over here yesterday while I was at work , to color her hair, left a mess in the bathroom, and drank the last of the milk. When she showed up today to get her furniture I had already changed the lock. I haven't seen or heard from her in 5 days so I was pretty ticked off that she she comes here when I'm not home. She can come to MY home when I'm here!


Empty nest feeling? No! I've NEVER lived on my own and I'm looking forward to it! :wink:

Reb

[4roses]

I completely understand where your coming from :wink: ... it took a while but the 'empty nest' will set in ..... My daughter has been on her own for several years now ~ and now we're the best of friends. Either way ... enjoy yourself ... it is nice only having to wash a few dishes, less dirty laundry and no more complaning when you ask them to do a chore around the house

[Ratdog]

The reason the lock was changed was she came over here yesterday while I was at work , to color her hair, left a mess in the bathroom, and drank the last of the milk. When she showed up today to get her furniture I had already changed the lock. I haven't seen or heard from her in 5 days so I was pretty ticked off that she she comes here when I'm not home. She can come to MY home when I'm here!


Empty nest feeling? No! I've NEVER lived on my own and I'm looking forward to it! :wink:

Reb

I know the feeling, we have had that happen to us, but were out of town at the time and their friends went through the medicine cabinets and drank a case of my beer. I don't mind helping the kids out here and there, but just taking things at will or abusing the stopped by and we are not home thing makes you mad as H*^L! Hope it smooths over for you.

[wildkat]

I remember when mine left...it's been 10 years now. I missed my girls badly at first, but then I was always so busy, so I didn't have time to worry about it too much.

Man, neither of my girls would ever just barge in when I wasn't at home! I never did change the locks...we MOVED instead LMAO!!!

[eastern ontario]

I remember when my oldest left....and now I look forward to youngest leaving (2yrs maybe???).

I've never lived on my own.....it'll be nice not to have to "answer" to someone else, so to speak.

[RebelDarlin]

I remember when mine left...it's been 10 years now. I missed my girls badly at first, but then I was always so busy, so I didn't have time to worry about it too much.

Man, neither of my girls would ever just barge in when I wasn't at home! I never did change the locks...we MOVED instead LMAO!!!

I've thought of that already!

[RebelDarlin]

I remember when my oldest left....and now I look forward to youngest leaving (2yrs maybe???).

I've never lived on my own.....it'll be nice not to have to "answer" to someone else, so to speak.

That's what I'm talking about. Now when I buy myself something it will still be there when I get home. The dishes in the sink will only be mine and my curling iron, clothes and other stuf will always be where I left them.


Reb

[Orangetxguy]

I remember when my oldest left....and now I look forward to youngest leaving (2yrs maybe???).

I've never lived on my own.....it'll be nice not to have to "answer" to someone else, so to speak.

That's what I'm talking about. Now when I buy myself something it will still be there when I get home. The dishes in the sink will only be mine and my curling iron, clothes and other stuf will always be where I left them.

Reb

And 90 days from now, when the freedom of being single & alone wears off...You are SO gonna want your kids back in the house!!!

[eastern ontario]

Not likely, I raised my kids myself. After so many years as a single parent, it's time for me then.

[RebelDarlin]

Not likely, I raised my kids myself. After so many years as a single parent, it's time for me then.

Same here... :wink:

[ogre999]

*Sigh * well mine came back after his little i want to live with mom fiasco .... which why wouldnt he after all she doesnt hold them accountable for ****e ......I guess at 18 he figured the destiny he was forging for himself was limited to the end of her couch and he didnt like the view ... No diploma ...no Drivers license no prospects ... so he finally manned up ( Imlay Man Academy Instructor here ) and came home ...

I cant complain I suppose ...just now I watched him walk out the door to drive himself to his G.E.D. test ... so I guess hes figured out the ol man isnt just a slave drivin @sshole .... which is a nice feeling for a change ...NOW if I could just get my daughter to wise up ...I get stuck with the payments and the reputation that leads to the name "Ogre" and it just seems to take them so long to realize the "World " doesnt owe you a thing ...and what you get out there you make for yourself ...


Shawn

*Sigh* well okay Im whinin now so ... anyway I envey you your liberation ....

[golfhobo]

The reason the lock was changed was she came over here yesterday while I was at work , to color her hair, left a mess in the bathroom, and drank the last of the milk. When she showed up today to get her furniture I had already changed the lock. I haven't seen or heard from her in 5 days so I was pretty ticked off that she she comes here when I'm not home. She can come to MY home when I'm here!


Empty nest feeling? No! I've NEVER lived on my own and I'm looking forward to it! :wink:

Reb

I didn't respond to this thread earlier, because I thought it was about you going trucking solo! Since I thought you had already been doing that, I was confused. Anyway....

I think that "thou doest protest too much." I WISH my bathroom didn't look the same way I left it last, and that SOMEONE would drink the milk that I leave putrifying in my fridge!

When I was younger, I couldn't even CONCEIVE of the idea that I could live alone. About 20 years ago, that became a reality. I was mildly surprised at first, at my success. Everyone WANTS to believe that they are self-sufficient and can survive in this world alone. A few years later, the shine was off the apple! I had PROVED my point.... but I was still ALONE.

A few years later, I again involved myself in a relationship with a woman. But, the seeds were sown. I apparently couldn't committ myself fully to NOT being alone. So, once again.... I became alone.

It has now been 17 MORE years that I have been alone. I would KILL for a child (even one I hated) to come and mess up my bathroom, or to drink all my milk, or to ask to borrow money!

As much as I protest against children, I know that they are what keeps us ALIVE! Those of you who HAVE them, and don't understand this, are not FOOLS, but only the "inexperienced" at what life is WITHOUT them.

Those of you who don't HAVE them, I pray you never have to KNOW. Get married....have children! The pain they bring you is a blessing! And if the marriage that spawns them fails? Do your BEST to be civil for ALL cncerned! It is YOUR LIFE that is in the balance!

One can no more blame a child for BEING a child, than one can blame himself for being a child. To do so, is to reject your OWN chldhood. And to do THIS, one would have to reject parenthood. And now that you ARE one.... how can you do this?

I can only say.... if one is blessed enough to BE a "parent," don't ask too many questions.....you may not want to know the answers! ..... and you are not equipped to deal with the options.

[wildkat]

The reason the lock was changed was she came over here yesterday while I was at work , to color her hair, left a mess in the bathroom, and drank the last of the milk. When she showed up today to get her furniture I had already changed the lock. I haven't seen or heard from her in 5 days so I was pretty ticked off that she she comes here when I'm not home. She can come to MY home when I'm here!


Empty nest feeling? No! I've NEVER lived on my own and I'm looking forward to it! :wink:

Reb

I didn't respond to this thread earlier, because I thought it was about you going trucking solo! Since I thought you had already been doing that, I was confused. Anyway....

I think that "thou doest protest too much." I WISH my bathroom didn't look the same way I left it last, and that SOMEONE would drink the milk that I leave putrifying in my fridge!

When I was younger, I couldn't even CONCEIVE of the idea that I could live alone. About 20 years ago, that became a reality. I was mildly surprised at first, at my success. Everyone WANTS to believe that they are self-sufficient and can survive in this world alone. A few years later, the shine was off the apple! I had PROVED my point.... but I was still ALONE.

A few years later, I again involved myself in a relationship with a woman. But, the seeds were sown. I apparently couldn't committ myself fully to NOT being alone. So, once again.... I became alone.

It has now been 17 MORE years that I have been alone. I would KILL for a child (even one I hated) to come and mess up my bathroom, or to drink all my milk, or to ask to borrow money!

As much as I protest against children, I know that they are what keeps us ALIVE! Those of you who HAVE them, and don't understand this, are not FOOLS, but only the "inexperienced" at what life is WITHOUT them.

Those of you who don't HAVE them, I pray you never have to KNOW. Get married....have children! The pain they bring you is a blessing! And if the marriage that spawns them fails? Do your BEST to be civil for ALL cncerned! It is YOUR LIFE that is in the balance!

One can no more blame a child for BEING a child, than one can blame himself for being a child. To do so, is to reject your OWN chldhood. And to do THIS, one would have to reject parenthood. And now that you ARE one.... how can you do this?

I can only say.... if one is blessed enough to BE a "parent," don't ask too many questions.....you may not want to know the answers! ..... and you are not equipped to deal with the options.

Hobo... I think you missed the point of this thread...

As a parent who has grown children & grandchildren, I will try to explain without adding to the pain you so obviously feel..

Both Reb & I were single parents, we love our children more than our own lives. We watched them grow, we struggled to teach them right from wrong, prayed that they would turn out to be good, upstanding citizens, & cried when they spread their wings to make their own way in the world, but we also KNEW we had to let them go.

Just because we are happy to have a life of our own, does not mean we don't miss them or never want them to come back, we just wish to have a piece of our life that is actually our own.

I suffered horribly when my girls left... even though they have made their own way & have built their own lives there are times when I miss them so badly I want to cry...would I turn back the clock? Not on your life.! I did the best I could & would probably screw up worse than I did the last time!

We have just come to a point in our lives that our main job is done & it's time for our young ones to make their own way, BUT we will always be there for them if they need us!

[mommee]

It has now been 17 MORE years that I have been alone. I would KILL for a child (even one I hated) to come and mess up my bathroom, or to drink all my milk, or to ask to borrow money!

You are more than welcome to babysit anytime, free of charge of course. In exchange you can experience children. :wink:

All kidding aside they are a joy most of the time. You who are mothers know what I mean. :wink:

I hear you Momme and everyone on here. I never thought I would have the joy of being a parent then almost did not want to be one after a VERY bad relationship with a EX with 5 kids. Then I put my shingle out again and met my wife and she had her son and I knew that but I was willing to try again. We have now been together 2 years and our daughter will be one on April 5th this year and I would not give her up for anything in the WORLD. She has me wrapped around her fingers so tight and KNOWS it. Golf called yes you were burned but take a chance HELL I DID after lets see here Ex wife was an Abuser of all kinds then 1st ex GF all she wanted was a Who The HELL Knows what she wanted maybe my income I think. 2nd ex turned out to be a lesbian using me to get better treatment from her lover 3rd Ex GF said she was wholesome then I googled her and found the X-rated movie of her and 40 men on the internet. Then I met my now wife.

So Golf Pick you butt up and try try again Hell I ashould have been burned to a crisp but what did I do kept trying you will find someone.

[RebelDarlin]

The reason the lock was changed was she came over here yesterday while I was at work , to color her hair, left a mess in the bathroom, and drank the last of the milk. When she showed up today to get her furniture I had already changed the lock. I haven't seen or heard from her in 5 days so I was pretty ticked off that she she comes here when I'm not home. She can come to MY home when I'm here!


Empty nest feeling? No! I've NEVER lived on my own and I'm looking forward to it! :wink:

Reb

I didn't respond to this thread earlier, because I thought it was about you going trucking solo! Since I thought you had already been doing that, I was confused. Anyway....

I think that "thou doest protest too much." I WISH my bathroom didn't look the same way I left it last, and that SOMEONE would drink the milk that I leave putrifying in my fridge!

When I was younger, I couldn't even CONCEIVE of the idea that I could live alone. About 20 years ago, that became a reality. I was mildly surprised at first, at my success. Everyone WANTS to believe that they are self-sufficient and can survive in this world alone. A few years later, the shine was off the apple! I had PROVED my point.... but I was still ALONE.

A few years later, I again involved myself in a relationship with a woman. But, the seeds were sown. I apparently couldn't committ myself fully to NOT being alone. So, once again.... I became alone.

It has now been 17 MORE years that I have been alone. I would KILL for a child (even one I hated) to come and mess up my bathroom, or to drink all my milk, or to ask to borrow money!

As much as I protest against children, I know that they are what keeps us ALIVE! Those of you who HAVE them, and don't understand this, are not FOOLS, but only the "inexperienced" at what life is WITHOUT them.

Those of you who don't HAVE them, I pray you never have to KNOW. Get married....have children! The pain they bring you is a blessing! And if the marriage that spawns them fails? Do your BEST to be civil for ALL cncerned! It is YOUR LIFE that is in the balance!

One can no more blame a child for BEING a child, than one can blame himself for being a child. To do so, is to reject your OWN chldhood. And to do THIS, one would have to reject parenthood. And now that you ARE one.... how can you do this?

I can only say.... if one is blessed enough to BE a "parent," don't ask too many questions.....you may not want to know the answers! ..... and you are not equipped to deal with the options.

Hobo... I think you missed the point of this thread...

As a parent who has grown children & grandchildren, I will try to explain without adding to the pain you so obviously feel..

Both Reb & I were single parents, we love our children more than our own lives. We watched them grow, we struggled to teach them right from wrong, prayed that they would turn out to be good, upstanding citizens, & cried when they spread their wings to make their own way in the world, but we also KNEW we had to let them go.

Just because we are happy to have a life of our own, does not mean we don't miss them or never want them to come back, we just wish to have a piece of our life that is actually our own.

I suffered horribly when my girls left... even though they have made their own way & have built their own lives there are times when I miss them so badly I want to cry...would I turn back the clock? Not on your life.! I did the best I could & would probably screw up worse than I did the last time!

We have just come to a point in our lives that our main job is done & it's time for our young ones to make their own way, BUT we will always be there for them if they need us!

WildKat, as usual you nailed it exactly! I love my daughter, sometimes too much. I can't tell you how many times, my life has been put on hold to make sure she had what she needed, or wanted. I have been a single mother for the last 18 years and my daughters welfare always came first.
I've turned down jobs, and men, because they weren't in her best interest.

In those 18 years, she has met 2 men that I dated and only after I was sure they would be around awhile. Not once did she ever wake up to a strange man in the house. I refused to raise my daughter that way. I also called off a wedding when I realized he didn't really want to be a step-father. (He insisted we send her to boarding school.) I've seen too many of her friends have to deal with a step-parent that really didn't want the kids around and I wouldn't put her, or myself through that. I know, I'm not "normal", or so I've been told.

That being said...
I am entering a new phase of my life and I am looking forward to it! I've been single a long time and honestly don't know if I'm too set in my ways to let anyone else in my life or not, but I now have the freedom to make that choice for myself, without it affecting a child who has no choice in the matter.

My children are more than welcome to come and see me whenever, but they are not going to have the run of my house when I'm not home. I don't think that is being unreasonable or un-motherly (I know it's not really a word). :wink:


Reb