Mr. Help Desk

[fdmax]

Dear Mr. Help Desk,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed
that the new program began making unexpected changes to the accounting
modules, limiting access to flower and jewelry applications that had
operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0. In addition, Husband 1.0
uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.9 but
installed undesirable programs such as NFL 5.0 and NBA 3.0.
Conversation 8.0 no longer runs and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes
the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but
to no avail.

Please help!

Desperate


Dear Desperate,

Please keep in mind that Boyfriend 5.0 is an entertainment package,
while Husband 1.0 is an operating system. Try to enter the command:
C:/I-THOUGHT-YOU-LOVED-ME and then install Tears 6.2. Husband 1.0
should then automatically run the applications: Guilty 3.0 and Flowers
7.0. But remember, overuse can cause Husband 1.0 to default to
GrumpySilence 2.5, HappyHour 7.0 or Beer 6.1. Beer 6.1 is a virus
that will create "Snoring Loudly" WAV sound files. DO NOT install
MotherInLaw 1.0 or reinstall another Boyfriend program. These are not
supported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited
memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. Consider buying
additional software to improve performance. I personally recommend
hotrod 3.0 and Lingerie 5.3.

[Windwalker]

Red Skelton said it best...

When they're engaged and later, on their honeymoon...
You can't wedge a pin between them.

Give them a few years of marriage...
and you can drive a hay-wagon between them.

[BlooMoose]

There's something about a little piece of paper that makes relationships totally change. Just because you have it, the "work at it" part is over, I guess. Kind of like getting a degree...just coz you got it doesn't mean you're smart...it means you know how to stick with something, know where to find what you need. I think people shouldn't get a marriage "certificate" until they have stuck with it long enough that they are successful...