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Thread: Older Women

  1. #1
    RebelDarlin's Avatar
    RebelDarlin is offline Senior Board Member RebelDarlin is on the right path.  You could probably safely loan them a quarter.
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Posts
    2,500

    Default Older Women

    An older lady gets pulled over for speeding...
    Older Woman: Is there a problem, Officer?

    Officer: Ma'am, you were speeding.

    Older Woman: Oh, I see.

    Officer: Can I see your license please?

    Older Woman: I'd give it to you but I don't have one.
    Officer: Don't have one?

    Older Woman: Lost it, 4 years ago for drunk driving.

    Officer: I see ...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please.

    Older Woman: I can't do that.

    Officer: Why not?

    Older Woman: I stole this car.

    Officer: Stole it?

    Older Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.

    Officer: You what?

    Older Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see

    The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.

    Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please! The woman steps out of her vehicle.

    Older woman: Is there a problem sir?

    Officer 2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.

    Older Woman: Murdered the owner?

    Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please.

    The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.

    Officer 2: Is this your car, ma'am?

    Older Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers.
    The officer is quite stunned.

    Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license.

    The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer.

    The officer examines the license. He looks quite puzzled.

    Officer 2: Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner.

    Older Woman: Bet the liar told you I was speeding, too.
    Don't Mess With Old Ladies !!!
    My reading of history convinces me that most bad government results from too much government.
    Thomas Jefferson- Democratic-Republican
    Responsibility is the ability to choose your response. Victims choose to be controlled by outside forces, Responsible people maintain control by making a choice.

  2. #2
    Jackrabbit379's Avatar
    Jackrabbit379 is offline Board Icon Jackrabbit379 is a distinguished poster and probably helps little old ladies across the street. Jackrabbit379 is a distinguished poster and probably helps little old ladies across the street. Jackrabbit379 is a distinguished poster and probably helps little old ladies across the street.
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    Wichita Falls,Tx
    Posts
    7,100

    Default

    So what happened? Did she get the speeding ticket?

  3. #3
    RebelDarlin's Avatar
    RebelDarlin is offline Senior Board Member RebelDarlin is on the right path.  You could probably safely loan them a quarter.
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Posts
    2,500

    Default

    I don't think so...
    My reading of history convinces me that most bad government results from too much government.
    Thomas Jefferson- Democratic-Republican
    Responsibility is the ability to choose your response. Victims choose to be controlled by outside forces, Responsible people maintain control by making a choice.

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