Truck Driving Jobs

|

Trucking Jobs

|

Truck Drivers

|

Trucking Companies





  #1 (permalink)  
Old 04-30-2008, 02:49 PM
Senior Board Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Posts: 2,822
Trukrswyfe is on the right path.  You could probably safely loan them a quarter.
Default Another Blonde Joke

>
> A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, 'Please come
> over here and help
> me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure
> out how to get
> started.'
>
> Her boyfriend asks, 'What is it supposed to be when
> it's finished?'
>
> The blonde says, 'According to the picture on the box,
> it's a rooster.'
>
> Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the
> puzzle.
>
> She lets him in and shows him where she has the
> puzzle spread all over
> the table.
>
> He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the
> box, then turns to
> her and says,
>
> 'First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going
> to be able to
> assemble these pieces into anything resembling a
> rooster.'
>
> He takes her hand and says, 'Second, I want you to
> relax. Let's have a
> nice cup of tea, and then ...' he said with a deep
> sigh, . .. . .. . .
>
>
>
>
> (scroll down)
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> 'Let's put all the Corn Flakes back in the box.'
>


Not sure how old this is. But it's cute.
Reply With Quote
  #2 (permalink)  
Old 04-30-2008, 11:41 PM
Drew10's Avatar
Senior Board Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 1,859
Drew10 is an unknown poster at this point.  Don't let him/her around power tools just yet.
Default

Quote:
Not sure how old this is. But it's cute


Its old....but...it is a classic, and needs repeated from time to time...


Two Blondes walk into a building.......
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
You would think one of them would have seen it!!!!
Reply With Quote
  #3 (permalink)  
Old 05-01-2008, 12:51 AM
Kranky's Avatar
Senior Board Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 1,050
Kranky is on the right path.  You could probably safely loan them a quarter.
Send a message via AIM to Kranky
Default

A car gets a flat on the interstate one day.
The blonde driver eases it over onto the shoulder of the road,
carefully steps out of the car and opens the trunk.

She takes out two cardboard men,
unfolds them and stands them at the rear of the vehicle facing oncoming traffic.
The lifelike cardboard men are in trench coats exposing their nude bodies and private parts to approaching drivers.
Not surprisingly, the traffic becomes snarled and backed up.
It isn't very long before a police car arrives.
The officer, clearly enraged, approaches the blonde
of the disabled vehicle yelling, "What's going on here?"
"My car broke down, officer" says the woman calmly.
"Well, what the hell are these obscene cardboard pictures
doing here by the road?" he asks.
"Helllooooooo!!!!" says the blonde.
"Those are my emergency flashers!"

:twisted:
__________________
If you can't shift it smoothly, you shouldn't be driving it.
Reply With Quote
  #4 (permalink)  
Old 05-01-2008, 02:58 PM
Senior Board Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Posts: 2,822
Trukrswyfe is on the right path.  You could probably safely loan them a quarter.
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Splitshifter
A car gets a flat on the interstate one day.
The blonde driver eases it over onto the shoulder of the road,
carefully steps out of the car and opens the trunk.

She takes out two cardboard men,
unfolds them and stands them at the rear of the vehicle facing oncoming traffic.
The lifelike cardboard men are in trench coats exposing their nude bodies and private parts to approaching drivers.
Not surprisingly, the traffic becomes snarled and backed up.
It isn't very long before a police car arrives.
The officer, clearly enraged, approaches the blonde
of the disabled vehicle yelling, "What's going on here?"
"My car broke down, officer" says the woman calmly.
"Well, what the hell are these obscene cardboard pictures
doing here by the road?" he asks.
"Helllooooooo!!!!" says the blonde.
"Those are my emergency flashers!"

:twisted:
Ilikeit..a..lot.
Reply With Quote
  #5 (permalink)  
Old 05-01-2008, 04:21 PM
Twilight Flyer's Avatar
The Bat Cave
Board Icon
 
Join Date: Nov 2002
Posts: 6,248
Twilight Flyer is a distinguished poster and probably helps little old ladies across the street.Twilight Flyer is a distinguished poster and probably helps little old ladies across the street.Twilight Flyer is a distinguished poster and probably helps little old ladies across the street.Twilight Flyer is a distinguished poster and probably helps little old ladies across the street.
Default

Not all blondes are dumb. One that I know of had beaten the stereotype. She was a successful business woman, owned her own company, and drove a flashy car.

As a matter of fact, one sunny afternoon she left work early and jumped in her Corvette convertable and took off down the road, her long blonde hair flowing behind her in the summer wind. She drove out of town and was enjoying her drive down the road, oceans of summer wheat swaying in the breeze on both sides of her.

That's when she saw her...way out in the middle of one of the fields was another blonde...attempting to row a boat across the field. The smart blonde slammed on her brakes and jumped out of the car, clearly angry.

"What the hell are you doing?" she yelled at the blonde in the boat.

"Well, duh," said the other. "I'm rowing my boat across this ocean of wheat! What's it look like?!"

The smart blonde was livid and shook her fist in fury. "You know, it's idiots like you that give us blondes a bad name! Because of people like you, everybody thinks were stupid! And I swear, I'd come out there and teach you a lesson if I could swim!"
__________________


Reply With Quote
  #6 (permalink)  
Old 05-01-2008, 11:40 PM
Jumbo's Avatar
Senior Board Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Northern Wisconsin
Posts: 2,085
Jumbo is a distinguished poster and probably helps little old ladies across the street.Jumbo is a distinguished poster and probably helps little old ladies across the street.Jumbo is a distinguished poster and probably helps little old ladies across the street.Jumbo is a distinguished poster and probably helps little old ladies across the street.
Default

Another blonde gets tired of all the blonde jokes so she goes to the salon and gets her hair dyed black. She then gets in her car and drives to the country where she passes a farmer standing in a pasture staring at his cows. Sitting beside the farmer is the most beautiful dog the girl has ever seen. She stops and says to the farmer "If I can tell you how many cows you have in the field can I have your dog"? The farmers says "yes". The girl looks for a minute and says "214". The farmer is surprised and says "You are correct". The girl picks up the dog and puts it in the car. As she starts the car the farmer says "Young lady how did you know how many cows I had"? The girls replies "I counted the legs and devided by four" The farmer thens says "Young lady if I guess your real hair color can I have my sheep back"?
__________________
Don't trust anybody. Especially that guy in the mirror.
Reply With Quote
  #7 (permalink)  
Old 05-02-2008, 12:02 AM
Drew10's Avatar
Senior Board Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 1,859
Drew10 is an unknown poster at this point.  Don't let him/her around power tools just yet.
Default

A dumb blonde, a smart blonde, and Santa Claus are walking down the street. There is a 5 dollar bill laying on the ground....Which one picks it up?
...............................Highlight.......... ..........................................
( Daaaa..The dumb blonde....there is no such thing as the other two )
Reply With Quote
  #8 (permalink)  
Old 05-02-2008, 02:18 PM
Senior Board Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Posts: 2,822
Trukrswyfe is on the right path.  You could probably safely loan them a quarter.
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Drew10
A dumb blonde, a smart blonde, and Santa Claus are walking down the street. There is a 5 dollar bill laying on the ground....Which one picks it up?
...............................Highlight.......... ..........................................
( Daaaa..The dumb blonde....there is no such thing as the other two )
Neither?

:?: :?: :?
Reply With Quote
  #9 (permalink)  
Old 05-03-2008, 12:20 AM
Drew10's Avatar
Senior Board Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 1,859
Drew10 is an unknown poster at this point.  Don't let him/her around power tools just yet.
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Trukrswyfe
[

Neither? ......??????.....
:?: :?: :?
Neither. :?: ..there is no neither...there are three smart/dumb/santa
the answer is in the para's. ...highlight it. :wink:
Reply With Quote
  #10 (permalink)  
Old 05-03-2008, 12:53 AM
Senior Board Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Posts: 2,822
Trukrswyfe is on the right path.  You could probably safely loan them a quarter.
Default

I really should have been born blonde



But Im not :twisted: :twisted:
Reply With Quote
  #11 (permalink)  
Old 05-03-2008, 01:10 AM
Drew10's Avatar
Senior Board Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 1,859
Drew10 is an unknown poster at this point.  Don't let him/her around power tools just yet.
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Trukrswyfe
I really should have been born blonde



But Im not :twisted: :twisted:
Did you want to be?????
Reply With Quote
  #12 (permalink)  
Old 05-03-2008, 01:15 AM
Senior Board Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Posts: 2,822
Trukrswyfe is on the right path.  You could probably safely loan them a quarter.
Default

Thats a yes and no answer.

Yes I would like to but, probably if I was one I would want to be brunette again.


Content just as I am. :P
Reply With Quote
  #13 (permalink)  
Old 05-03-2008, 01:24 AM
Drew10's Avatar
Senior Board Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 1,859
Drew10 is an unknown poster at this point.  Don't let him/her around power tools just yet.
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Trukrswyfe
Thats a yes and no answer.

Yes I would like to but, probably if I was one I would want to be brunette again.


Content just as I am. :P
As you should be...... :P
Reply With Quote
  #14 (permalink)  
Old 05-20-2008, 05:14 PM
Senior Board Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Posts: 2,822
Trukrswyfe is on the right path.  You could probably safely loan them a quarter.
Default

A blonde gets on an airplane and sits down in the first class section of the plane. The stewardess rushes over to her and tells her she must move to coach because she doesn't have a first class ticket. The blonde replies, "I'm blonde, I'm smart, I have a good job, and I'm staying in first class until we reach Jamaica." The disgusted stewardess gets the head stewardess who asks the blonde to leave. The blonde yet again repeats "I'm blonde, I'm smart, I have a good job and I'm staying in first class until we reach Jamaica." The head stewardesses doesn't even know what to do at this point because they still have to get the rest of the passengers seated to take off; the blonde is causing a problem with boarding now, so the stewardess gets the copilot. The copilot goes up to the blonde and whispers in her ear. She immediately gets up and goes to her seat in the coach section. The head st ewardess asks the copilot in amazement what he said to get her to move to her correct seat. The copilot replies, "I told her the front half of the airplane wasn't going to Jamaica."
Reply With Quote
  #15 (permalink)  
Old 06-01-2008, 02:10 AM
Rookie
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 18
stardust3996 is an unknown poster at this point.  Don't let him/her around power tools just yet.
Send a message via Yahoo to stardust3996
Default Uhhhhh. DUH!

It's gonna take me a little while to come up with a good'n. I'll be back in a later. :idea:
Reply With Quote
  #16 (permalink)  
Old 06-01-2008, 02:28 AM
Kranky's Avatar
Senior Board Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 1,050
Kranky is on the right path.  You could probably safely loan them a quarter.
Send a message via AIM to Kranky
Default

Didja hear about the Blonde who was running crazily thru the local grocery store stabbing boxes of Frosted Flakes with a butcher knife?

When questioned by police, the Blonde said she was trying to be a cereal killer.

__________________
If you can't shift it smoothly, you shouldn't be driving it.
Reply With Quote
  #17 (permalink)  
Old 06-01-2008, 02:31 AM
Senior Board Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Posts: 2,822
Trukrswyfe is on the right path.  You could probably safely loan them a quarter.
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Splitshifter
Didja hear about the Blonde who was running crazily thru the local grocery store stabbing boxes of Frosted Flakes with a butcher knife?

When questioned by police, the Blonde said she was trying to be a cereal killer.

Reply With Quote
  #18 (permalink)  
Old 06-05-2008, 04:47 AM
GTR SILVER's Avatar
Senior Board Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: new jersey
Posts: 594
GTR SILVER is an unknown poster at this point.  Don't let him/her around power tools just yet.
Default

Blonde in a Boat

There was a blonde driving down the road one day. She glanced to her right and noticed another blonde sitting in a nearby field, rowing a boat with no water in sight.

The blonde angrily pulled her car over and yelled at the rowing blonde, "What do you think you're doing? It's things like this that give us blondes a bad name. If I could swim, I'd come out there and kick your butt!"

:arrow: :arrow: :arrow: :shock: :shock: :wink: 8) 8)
__________________
www.townhall.com

I know God will not give me anything I can't handle. I just wish that He didn't trust me so much.
Mother Teresa

"The true soldier fights not because he hates what is in front of him, but because he loves what is behind him." G.K. CHESTERTON

"Qui non intelligit aut discat aut taceat"
Who does not understand should either learn, or be silent.
The Mark Levin Show
Reply With Quote
  #19 (permalink)  
Old 06-14-2008, 05:32 PM
Rookie
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 18
stardust3996 is an unknown poster at this point.  Don't let him/her around power tools just yet.
Send a message via Yahoo to stardust3996
Default This one has a little polical humor. (Could be blonde joke)

A Japanese doctor says, 'Medicine in my country is so advanced that we can take a kidney out of one man, put it in another, and have him out looking for work in six weeks.'

A German doctor says, 'That is nothing. We can take a lung out of one person, put it in another, and have him out looking for work in four weeks.'

A British doctor says, 'In my country medicine is so advanced that we can take half a heart out of one person, put it in another, and have both of them out looking for work in two weeks.'

The American doctor, not to be outdone, interjected, 'You guys are way behind. We are about to take a woman with no brains, put her in the White House, and then half the country will be out looking for work...
__________________
Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off






Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.7.2
Copyright ©2000 - 2009, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Content Relevant URLs by vBSEO 3.2.0
Content Relevant URLs by vBSEO 3.2.0
Trucking Companies | Trucking Job Search | Online Job Application | Trucking Links | Truck Drivers Message Board | Forum Archives | Contact Us | Site Map


Truck Driving Jobs © 2003 ClassADrivers.com
Website Design By CAD Website Design | CAD Enterprises LLC
 
New Users Register Free Account Here | Existing Forum Members Log In Here
Home | About Us | Contact Us | Testimonials | Spell Check

Class A Drivers.com

Application          Company Listings          Job Search        Load Board